Collaborate without boundaries

Love and Hate

  • Comments 4

It has been exactly 2 weeks today that my husband told me that he no longer loved me, and day 8 in the Love Dare.  Up to that point he was always nice and friendly.  Now he behaves as though he hates me. How did it change so quickly?   He seems always grouchy, hateful and miserable now and that hurts me so much as much for him as it does for me.  I don't want him to be miserable but neither do I want my marriage to dissolve.  I have to keep believing that if I am faithful to God, He will continue to be more than faithful to me but some days are easier than others.  I've asked God this morning for more strength and courage, and I need a huge dose of whatever it takes to make me longer-suffering I guess.  When I compare my circumstances with Jesus when He was here, all I can think is, WOW, what love!!!

  • Welcome! The pain of rejection is real, but as you know the reality of the love of God is so much more fulfilling. I don't know how much you know about what is going on here but I'm glad God sent you here.

    This is a journey between you and Jesus, take it as that and you will find the fulfillment and love you need for this trial, this will take you to another level in your relationship with God, Getting your husband/marriage back could be a happy side efect, but don't focus on that right now, just dive into getting to know Jesus.

    Do a dare a day no more no less, any more is taking the work out of God's hands, he works better when we are out of the way. Your husband will be used as a tool to mold you, take joy in the fact that God chose you to go through this not him, be thankfull in all things.

    Hang in there God is not done yet, I look forward to seeing what God has in store for you. Prayers.

  • Thanks Josh.  I realized the goal about day 5 or 6, but I have one question. I know that I need to reach a point in my walk with Jesus, that if I lose my husband, I will still be ok.  But how much bad behavior do I tolerate?  Do I go like a lamb to the slaughter without a word?  Do I emulate Jesus down to the last nut and bolt?  

  • things may get worse before it gets better.  if so, do not worry.  It will serve purpose.  Along with what Josh said, have no expectations from him when you do the dares.  Do not read ahead in the book, except the appendix, and based on your reply to Josh, you really need to read about leading the heart in the appendix.

    You must decrease, Christ must increase in you.  It is a lifelong journey.  Did Christ give up and say it was just too hard for Him? No He didn't.  So as Christ did not give up for your sake, you don't give up for his sake.

  • In addition to josh and Tim’s comments. As you grow in Christ, He will place more and more conviction on your husband, and hence he will have no idea what is going on and to justify what he is doing, well, he needs you to react in ways that make your walk not true in his eyes. Your husband sees the changes and doesn’t like it because it is from love, and that doesn’t continue to justify his decision.

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