Collaborate without boundaries

Lean not on my own understanding

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So one nights sleep away from my wife introducing her new boyfriend to our daughter, and then tell me that she has finally found someone she wants to date (Even though I know of 3-4 others that she has tried with).  Anyways I digress.  I spent the night in his word, and praying as much as I could, till I didn’t even know what to say anymore so I just asked my spirit to intercede for me with the lord. This morning I chose to buy her coffee and donuts like I have when I drop our daughter back off at her house.  She said thank you, and wished me a great day.  I can’t answer honestly what my motives where, I try to think it is just showing her unconditional love, and reassuring her that like Christ my arms are always open for her return, or is it that I am trying to win her back.  I do think it is mostly the first, but being as selfish as I am, I am sure some of it was to show see I love you this much that even sharing that can’t shake my love.  You kind of like trying to prove it to her.  I have offered this up, and just decided I needed to do the action, because if I didn’t it would be because of my emotions and hurting, so I didn’t want to do something out of spite.


God has been showing me many things through devotionals and different messages I have been listening too.  His word in Psalms has been very inspiring.  I know this is a test of my faith, that my heart is hurting because it is being molded.  That neither I nor my wife are refined enough yet to be with each other.  If we were to return to the marriage we would have too many issues that we had before and that would cause new problems.

I am at times able to offer up my pain to the lord, and try really hard to keep my mind someplace other than my wife.  I want to go to the appreciation room and look for the things I love about her, but it seems to be locked on me right now.  As soon as she comes to mind I am in the deprecation room and it is ugly in there. That is why I try not to think of her at all, and think as much as possible about Christ, his word, his love for me, and his promises that all things are for my good because I love him.  That he will give me the desire of my heart if I can delight in him and trust in the lord. 



Finally this verse is the one that has given me the most strength today.  Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. 

  • Fantastic to see you gaining comfort in His word.  

    Sometimes there is no kind thought that can come to mind with our spouses and that is when you choose to lead your heart and that's about all you can do.  Lead your heart to forgive and love unconditionally.  Just as Jesus came for all the undesirables in society, the unjust, tax collectors, and the downtrodden, prostitutes, etc, you need to be there for her if/when she comes back.  

    Live your life enjoying it in Christ and she will see Christ in you.  And she needs that.  so, give her Christ's light just by doing as the dares have taught.

  • New International Version Luke 6:27

    "But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,"  This is what came to mind when I read your post.   It is obedience to His word when we do kind and thoughtful things for spouses who seem to hate us and want nothing to do with us.  Jesus died for a world that wanted nothing from Him.  He was compelled by His love for us.  If love compels you to do kind things for your wife, then I see obedience to God's word.  Don't overthink what you do for your wife.  Just do what is right and good and let God sort out the results.

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