Collaborate without boundaries

Excited

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My wife seems to be more happy..after we were done watching a movie we had happy conversations and laughter again..I asked her if she wanted to ride in the car with me today to church and she she thought long about it like 30 seconds to answer she said no she'll take her car and then later she sends me a text while im in the bathroom that she will ride with me to church. This is exciting because we have not shared car time in awhile. Our Pastor preached the first service on how Men are under attack and the enemy is doing everything he can to get us Men out of position and when we get out of position the whole household gets out of position..It may have spoke to her

We have a meeting with our Pastor this Friday on discussing the seperation..

 

My wife originally just wanted a divorce..then she changed to separation..then she changed to was about to give me a 2nd chance but I lied to her..now still stuck on seperation..but she keeps asking me if I will be able to pay the bills without her because she doesn't want to leave me high and dry..I told her I could manage the finances even tho I dont want her to go. Also want to say Yesterday she brought up randomly she doesn't know what's going to happen but the seperation and space is well needed. She wants to separate because she does not believe I can change and I've lied to her in the past..but I know what my God is doing and he is doing something in me..I told her yesterday honestly if I wouldn't have made my mistakes I would still have the same mindset I had a month ago..but I choose to be like Christ and endure through every circumstance. I'm excited and optimistic no matter what happens 

  • Enjoy the good changes and let God know you enjoy Him so much more.

    This is a time where she most likely will see that she let her guard down.  And probably will choose to harden right back up to prove to you she hasn't softened and to justify her behavior.  

    This is also a dangerous time.  A time where you will want to pull her car up to yours.  Read schumura journals from oldest to newest.  This is a dangerous time because now that God's got her to where she's softened, you see the change and will want to take control from God and speed up the reconcilliation.  And you will know you are trying to take control when you do more than a dare a day.

  • She still needs her space.  And she most likely if she continues to soften, will soften at a slower pace than you hope.  have no expectations of her changing.  because you will be disappointed in the changes coming more slowly than you hope and she will see your expectations and think of it as you controlling her.  Let God fix this, after all, it is you that got you in this mess, so trust Him.

    Great news.  Now if things backslide, remember how you feel now and how you chose to be joyful no matter what happens.

  • It's great you have seen a change quickly. But it is also a hardship for you. Because the longer the trial continues in the tough moments, the more endurance in Christ you have.  So, make sure you stay in the dares, and never forget patience, kindness, biting your tongue and controlling your emotions, not letting them control you.

  • AS you continue a dare a day look for ways to continue your growth in Christ.  

  • Yea kind of got disappointed right now..she was saying that she has too much make up and I told her I can build her a shelf above her vanity..she said might want to hold off on that because ill be moving out in a few weeks..

    I don't know why that hurt...I already knew that ..

  • It hurt because the change you saw for a moment lead to you having expectations of her.  And this leads to finding comfort in our spouse instead of keeping our source of comfort in Christ.  

    Remember, she will be on a roller coaster ride.  

  • The separation can do some good if you can be fully committed to working on yourself. Don't give in to temptation. Serve your wife while separated as best you can. Show her you can change. Habits take 30 days or something like that to form so start thinking about what habits your wife wants you to have and make them goals.

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