Today was the day I started my journey over again, this time from a much different and better point than the last time.  It still isn't easy, but a journey worth taking again. 

The day couldn't have gotten off to a worse start.  I didn't sleep well last night because Cindy my wife was very upset with me, and she wouldn't talk.  She would just make flip statements just to get me going and then say I'm going to sleep now.  She knows just how to push my buttons.  Well this morning I was up just after 5:30 and just couldn't fall back asleep, so I got up and went downstairs.  When she woke up after 7 she came downstairs and said "what are you doing?" in a very derogatory tone as I was reading the paper online.  When I told her that I wasn't feeling good and couldn't sleep anymore she just acted like that wasn't a good enough reason, and that I was trying to hide something from her, and she went back upstairs to start to get the kids up.

I followed her up a couple minutes later to get ready for work and before I got my shower, asked her nicely and calmly to  tell me what I was doing to make her so mad and how I could prove to her that I have nothing to hide.  I said that I've worked to hard and am continuing to improve myself  to make our marriage work and am not going to throw it away by trying to hide anything from her.  She said nothing.  But when I got out of the shower and was getting ready she had Ironed my cloths for the day.  I just don't understand..............

Before I left for work I made sure that I thanked her for ironing my cloths and was able to give her a hug and kiss on the cheek.

After work we were pleasant to each other and I helped her with a few things around the house after soccer practice.

I was able to not say anything negative today.  I've gotten better at that but I need to really work on how to deal with issues with Cindy so that it doesn't feel like I'm entering a battlefield.

I'm looking forward to day 2, but It's hard constantly recieving mixed signals.