havent really had anything that drag me away
maybe the shame part , sometimes i accidentally talked something about him in front of others, i havent really talked to anyone about it lately
he has pretty much all four problems but i dont really see much about myself except the shame part
so what should i do?
Pray on it and see if He opens the door for you to realize...
You say you dont have issues, but your spouse has all of them. Maybe one needs to take the log out of their own eye first?
What about single male friends? ANYONE or ANYTHING that takes away your attention from your spouse counts. This could mean a favorite TV show, etc......could mean friends and family that you vent about your spouse on...
Pray on it......Christ will show you....
Where ever we find ourselves today, is because of the choices we made before. We have a contribution to every situation i our lives and its easier to pass the blame then to take resposibility for our roll in the mess we find ourselves in.
I am not saying you are the one who made your husband do what he does, that is by his own choise as well but my advice is to ask God to show you your faults and ask Him to help you make right what needs to be made right.
" If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:8-9 RSV)
So to stand here saying everything wrong in your marriage is your husbands fault is absolute untrue. We all have our faults and we all have to lay them down daily at the feet of God.
the bible also gives us clear instructions about how to behave as a wife. Are you doing that? Do you respect your husband. and I am not talking about pretending to be all sweet and what not when he is around but in your heart you curse him. That is not respect.
Remember God searches our heart. The unspoken things of the soul, so as much as your hasband might be doing things you are not happy about, this walk is not about your husbands and all his wrongs. Its about you and being in right standing with God. Bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, stife these are all works of the flesh and in Galatians we are warned against such things. These things poison your soul and we cannot expect God to move in our lives when these rule over us.
This process is for God to work on the hurt and pain that is poisoning your soul, that is weighing you down ad restore the joy and peace that only He can give.
You need to ask Him to work forgiveness in your heart for your husband, cause by yourself it is impossible. You need to ask HIm to help you release the bitterness and resentment that has grown such deep roots in you, so that you can step into possition to live the live that will bring transformation in your life and marriage.
I hope you will consider letting go of what you have no control over. You cannot control what your husband do or dont do, but you can control what you do.
May God fold His arms around you and grant you peace. May His love for you become so real that you accept it and let Him love you back to life and restore the years the enemy has stolen from you.
Be careful here. Read that dare closely. It could be something as simple as a TV, a computer etc... Is there anything that you spend time on that takes potential time away from oneness?
And now in each dare you need to take it one step further (Which is the true intent of the journey) what can you take out of your life to create more margin daily for Christ?