day 14 and 15
been really really busy, dont even have time to write on here...
my son having fever last night, well i was not quite sure if i was doing right
my mom and grandma want me to file the divorce because they both think that my husband is not going to take care of me and he will ask for divorce later since he has never really love me
but i think god keep telling me to hang in there and i know that i cant change him but change myself
this is what one of my friends told me too
i think i still mean and horrible, i tried nto to be though
i m super tired everyday, my son just take tons of my time everyday...really tired....
well i sent my husband a text say thank for watching my son last night , i still did not sleep good since he has fever,
i think i didnt do well on treating my husband good today, but i made him sandwiches to bring to work thats about it
i still feel no love from him
but i remembered the day i go fill the paper out for divorce, god keeps pulling me away from it, so i guess i will keep hanging in there for 40 days and hope i will change my bad attitude...
It is common to have the ways of the world thrown at you - your Mom and Grandma telling you to file for divorce since they believe your husband won't take care of you and will file later anyway. A website Jason (jsond) shared wiht me awhile back does a fantastic job of refuting worldly thinking about divorce. cyber-church.com/ser0200.htm. A passage from it I specificlally want to share with you -
****"You deserve better" is not biblical! God's message is one of unconditional love, forgiveness, and hope. Since God is the creator of all things, He sets the rules. It doesn't matter what anybody's opinions are, not even your pastor's; all that matters is what God has to say. And as the One who ordained marriage, He has a lot to say.
For instance, the book of Hosea is about a prophet with an extremely unfaithful wife. God did NOT say to Hosea, "Divorce her and find someone else; this isn't what I had in mind, and you deserve better." No! He told Hosea to go get her and take her back! In their marriage, Hosea's love for his wife symbolized God's love for his people, and his wife represented Israel's unfaithfulness in their covenant relationship to God.****
My FAVORITE book is Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers. Its foundation is from the book of Hosea. I HIGHLY recommend it. It is so dang applicable to our Love Dare journeys.
There is good reason God is pulling you away from filing for divorce because He does NOT want you to! You need to keep your focus on Christ NOT your husband. Remember this is all about your walk with Him and your husband is used as a tool along the way. Continue to give it all up to Him. Let Him mold you each and every day!
In the Bible it states that Moses gave us divorce because the hardening of our hearts, but Christ said from the beginning it was not so...
There are reasons for divorce, however when you look to Christ and desire to please Him through your actions you have a blessing that cannot be replaced.
The feelings you have are ones of selfishness. Of spite and of pride. And you family and friends are also giving you their worldly understanding as advice. You cannot listen to them, you must lead your heart to Christ and from there see what is in Gods plan.