Collaborate without boundaries

Exams. Hope. Confusion

  • Comments 5

Hello, everyone.. I missed you all from this site.. I may have been away for quite some time but your stories, lessons and words of encouragement are with me. Whenever I feel down, I pray and I try to remember your encouraging thoughts. THANK YOU!


I am hear to just share some updates. Husband and I are still apart and I dont see it getting any better. I left the city where we used to live last May. He has been calling me from time to time since then. However since September up to now, I havent heard from him. I attempted to call him to find that my NUMBERS are already blocked from his phone (it hurts). I have to use a friends phone so I can reach him and inform him of the expenses needed for my review. My husband would however deny that he blocked me (c'mon) but I did not make a big deal out of it when we talked. There's no point. It's his phone anyway. Yesterday, I checked his Facebook profile. Something I haven't done for a long time. And I found out that he already removed the cover photo (I was his cover photo) and removed our pictures from his featured photos as well (we are not FB friends btw. I can just see what's public in his profile). 


Since May I have been focusing on the upcoming exams and on growing and becoming better. I can say I am doing pretty well until yesterday. I cant tell if it was the anxiety that made me want to call him or I missed him. And instead of feeling better I felt worse. Everything just GOT REAL. I guess, before, when I see his FB page with our photos still there it gives me some hope that he is still somehow "keeping things" private. That he is still saying he is married. Now that all is gone, it was like he is embracing the SINGLE life. And it feels I am stab in the heart. That glimmer of hope that we will be reunited one day just disappeared. :( I prayed and cried and prayed. Pain remains but not as painful as it was a year ago. I still do believe that God is good. :)


Friends, I dont even know if I needed "advice" now. I am just lost re: my marriage. It's like everything is going the opposite of my prayers. I dont even know what to pray for anymore. :(


Anyway, I will be taking the BAR EXAMS soon. It's going to be the 4 Sundays of November, hence I need to focus. This is something within my sphere of control thus it deserves more effort and attention than my marriage, which is already on God's hands. 


Since my ecams are coming up, I am humbly asking for your prayers.. You know what I have been through and though my pain is not something that would "entitle" me to get that title, I do pray I will still have it. It will definitely help opening doors for independence and self support. Please please pray for me.. Please pray for me to pass this exams and for me to have a heart to accept God's will for my marriage. THANK YOU! 

  • Prayers said.  Been thinking you may journal soon.  If you would like to read something encouraging, read Lynn's last two journals.  

    It is kind of funny how certain things at certain times can just knock the wind right out of us.  I had something happen and just couldn't shake the funk it got me in.  And then Linda said something and the  cloud lifted and I felt His joy immediately.  I pray something hits you and everyone on this site when the need arises to get past the pain or discontent feeling.

  • Prayers said.  Been thinking you may journal soon.  If you would like to read something encouraging, read Lynn's last two journals.  

    It is kind of funny how certain things at certain times can just knock the wind right out of us.  I had something happen and just couldn't shake the funk it got me in.  And then Linda said something and the  cloud lifted and I felt His joy immediately.  I pray something hits you and everyone on this site when the need arises to get past the pain or discontent feeling.

  • Fear, worry, stress will not help you with the exams.  But studying and prayer will.  And you can control these things.  Prepare as you are and look at this as an experience to enjoy.  If pass, terrific.  If you don't, God's got you covered.  So, what's to lose?  Nothing really.  

    You are putting way to much stock into what he's thinking in taking the pictures down on FB.  I doubt he put as much thought into taking the pictures down as you did in rationalizing why he took them down.  

    Let that go.  Just like most of us got over our spouses no longer wearing their wedding ring, the pictures don't define what's going to happen.  I think God is a little more powerful than pictures being taken off of FB.

    Do your best to smile at God for all He is preparing for you.  And trust He knows and will provide for more than you need.  Find His peace in your favorite verses and in prayer.

  • One thing  I have learned, Princess,  is that doing the right thing doesn't hinge on what anyone else does. If you were doing the right thing in your own mind and heart according  to what you understand it's God's will for you, then it doesn't matter what your husband does or doesn't do.   I think you're right, you are in the middle of a huge milestone in your life, and you would like to share it with the person you love. There is nothing wrong with that. It is another hurdle to get over.  It hurts.   I know it does. But you are strong, and you can do this. When you have done it, and you have accomplished it despite all the obstacles, you will have more confidence in yourself and your God then you would have had under better circumstances.  You are in my prayers tonight!

  • Prayer arrows shot up for you and good to hear from you! It’s easy to believe that our hubs life they choose is fun and happy but I am confident it is not all that...probably far from it.  Hold your head high princess of the one true king...He has great things planned for you!

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