Collaborate without boundaries

Day 17 - Prayer and Grace

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I've been a few days behind on my dares.  Instead of trying to put them all in, I'll do a quick recap.  my wife has been out of town for a few days.  I did the dares that I could with her.  I felt pretty good about myself and my relationship with God.  I felt I was doing the right thing and that he was pleased.  I even had a few general convos with my wife.  Small victories.  It all came crashing down for me when one day, my wife called and said that I was two-faced.  one day I''m telling her I loved her all while sneaking behind her back and getting a lawyer!  I was completely taken back.!  I was only getting a lawyer for my financial protection and have a fair fight about custody, etc.  Anyway, she further said that her heart was starting to change, but now she is DONE, no spending the holidays together, no talking - DONE!!!!!!  I' was so heartbroken, angry, and even felt some depression kicking in.  I was not in a good place emotionally!!!  I had enough sense to contact my spiritual friends to help me through what seemed to be the worst day of this dare.  I somehow made it through the night and decided to continue the journey.

Fast-forward a few days and that brings me to today.  Yesterday I prayed for my wife and told her I was praying for her.  I didnt get a response, but i didnt care.  I was doing the right thing.  Today, i feel good.  I'm have a sense of peace even though I dont see the fruit of my labor. Today I will continue to preay and show her unconditional love.  I plan to talk to her this evening to see if there is anything that she wants to share as per the Love Dare.  We'll see what happens.

  • I didn't want to get a lawyer but all my Christian friends and Christian marriage therapist is telling me I better for financial protection and for the children. I hate it but I have to. My wife was also mad about that. Our spouses are looking for anything they can find to justify their own anger. We have to look for anything we can to love them regardless of their decisions.

    My wife also told me a couple weeks ago that I was pushing her farther away. This was confusing because I thought I had pushed her as far away as I could so I got to thinking "Is she really NOT that far away?" THEN I got to thinking "Why am I sitting here trying to analyze her every move? It's only driving me crazy."

    I think we are best just to live day to day and show love. Unconditional love. But the lawyer is a necessity. If they want to do what they are doing to us then they can't expect any less. We have to protect ourselves.

    A couple weeks ago my wife asked me if I asked someone to pray for her and I suspected it was her sister because her sister had called me earlier that day asking how things were going. I told her not good and asked her to pray for my wife and me so I asked my wife who told her that and she wouldn't tell me. So I said "I probably have asked 100 people to pray for you." I just couldn't believe she was upset because I asked someone to pray for her. But I have to remember that right now in her state of mind everything I do is wrong, and the wrong things I do are gargantuan.

    "You shall eat the fruit of your labor of your hands, you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you."

    Psalm 128:2

  • No matter what you do, she will use it against you.  You could jump in front of a bullet to save her and she would say you only did that to put a hole in the shirt she bought you for your birthday.  

    You could not get a lawyer and she would be mad because you weren't taking her seriously.

    But these fits they throw can get us to think we do nothing right.  But it is good you seeked God.

  • No matter what you do, she will use it against you.  You could jump in front of a bullet to save her and she would say you only did that to put a hole in the shirt she bought you for your birthday.  

    You could not get a lawyer and she would be mad because you weren't taking her seriously.

    But these fits they throw can get us to think we do nothing right.  But it is good you seeked God.

  • No matter what you do, she will use it against you.  You could jump in front of a bullet to save her and she would say you only did that to put a hole in the shirt she bought you for your birthday.  

    You could not get a lawyer and she would be mad because you weren't taking her seriously.

    But these fits they throw can get us to think we do nothing right.  But it is good you seeked God.

    It can easily be when you do not see the fruit of your labor that is when God is moving the most in the trial.  

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