Collaborate without boundaries

Day 13 - Love fights, and fights, and fights

  • Comments 2

It's been getting more difficult to keep up with the journal entries but I'm trying to make time when I can. This particular dare landed on the day of our daughter's birthday. The day was cold, rainy, and busy with three year olds running around in princess costumes. I did not really see an opportunity to discuss any boundaries together with him so I opted to make my own boundaries to fight by. I set quite a few, using some of the suggestions in the chapter. I also added some like "Using 'I feel' statements instead of 'you always, you don't, etc' ", "I will not use my words or the past as weapons to put another down", and "I will seek to compromise instead of shooting another idea/statement down if I do not agree with it". I know these are areas that I not only need to work on, but I think can turn a lot of our disagreements or arguments around once I put these into practice. There still has been little to no communication between us but I'm going to hold onto these rules regardless. I'm still fighting for love, still trying to seek God's heart in the midst of all of this. I think I'm finally beginning to understand what it means to lead your heart. I've been facing all sorts of temptations as of lately and constantly needing to fight them off, fight off certain thoughts and actions, and remember who I'm doing all of this for. 

  • As you continue the dares, following the rules to fight you set up will become easier.  Even if  he doesn't change for the better.

  • I made my list of boundaries using the ones from the book then added a few of my own. I broke one of them last night by arguing in front of the children. So this morning I pulled out my list and read over it to remind myself of what I had promised. I suggest reading over yours every day to keep them fresh in your head. It's easy to slip up and make a mistake.

    It's excellent that you see your own faults. It gives you something to work on. I promise if you stay loyal to God and yourself people will notice and eventually your husband will notice. That doesn't mean things will work out the way you want it to but you will make a positive impact on his life.

    I empathize with your communication issue. My wife and I barely talk at all and when we do it ends up in an argument. I have become much better at arguing well though- if there is such a thing. I don't talk about certain things- as listed in my boundaries, and I do not attack. I try to use "I feel" statements also.

    Continue to fight for love. Don't give up.

    When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

    James 1:13-15

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