Collaborate without boundaries

At a standstill again..

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Well we are at a standstill again.  Things were pretty peaceful for awhile and now things are back to my husband being silent and distant.  Two weeks ago two people that used to be in his bike club were murdered outside a restaurant  where all the clubs were for a school supply drive they were gunned down at a stop light at the intersection and a lot of people saw it.  My husband was of course there and I was calling him and texting him when I saw it on the news.  He responded pretty quickly that he was ok and he came home about 15 minutes after I called him. That whole weekend he was home except for a meeting with the club and he was gone the whole day of course. He has been getting frustrated with money again and my parents. He picked my mom up from chemo the other day and was pretty aggravated because my dad was there and he didnt know so he drove the car and it was a tight fit.  Then he got aggravated with me because we found out that his mom has thyromegaly and tumors on each side of her thyroid so no she has to see a specialist. He told me that I should have made her go to the doctor sooner. She is very stubborn so that was something I could not do.  He has been really quiet for a number of days and then the other day he texted me at work saying he was going to be gone next weekend to Jacksonville for a bike club anniversary weekend.  Of course I would rather him not go but hes going to anyway.  Its day to day with him.  One day he speaks the next day no.  He still  will not sleep in same room as me if I'm in the bed he will go sleep in the mancave.  He only talks to me when he wants to so I keep quiet and leave him alone.  I have so much going on with both of our mom and me trying to find another job because my office is closing down and now trying to figure out who is going to pick the kids up froms school because my parents vehicle situation is still not fixed.  I pray everyday for all these areas in my life and am being still to let God work,

  • Things were peaceful for awhile, that's progress and lays a little more foundation for him to fall back on.  Even if he built the wall back up, he knows a little more how to bring it back a little back down again.

    One day he speaks to you, the next day he doesn't.  I know it doesn't feel good, but look at how it was.  Where he was more verbally harsh or didn't speak at all.  Or wasn't home at all.  (If my poor memory is correct.)

    It may not be ideal for him to leave for the weekend.  but thank God he lets you know where and when he is going vs just leaving for a few days with no notice and leaving you wondering if he's dead or alive.

    Sometimes in the trial it is hard to notice anything remotely positive.

  • Things were peaceful for awhile, that's progress and lays a little more foundation for him to fall back on.  Even if he built the wall back up, he knows a little more how to bring it back a little back down again.

    One day he speaks to you, the next day he doesn't.  I know it doesn't feel good, but look at how it was.  Where he was more verbally harsh or didn't speak at all.  Or wasn't home at all.  (If my poor memory is correct.)

    It may not be ideal for him to leave for the weekend.  but thank God he lets you know where and when he is going vs just leaving for a few days with no notice and leaving you wondering if he's dead or alive.

    Sometimes in the trial it is hard to notice anything remotely positive.

  • And sometimes when things are the tiniest bit more on the positive side compared how it use to be we, without realizing it, look even harder at the negative side of things.  

    Take a day and let go of all the negative things he is doing.  And just thank God all day about things like he comes home, he comes home to sleep under his own roof, he talks on some days, he isn't as verbally abusive as before, he still helps now and then with your mom, he lets you know when he is going to go out of town.  And on this day you think of all these good things, really just let go of all the negative things and tell Jesus you are wanting Him to handle all the negative for the day.

  • I know things are not fair or right in any way.  And the world would say nothing positive is happening.  But with God all is possible, and with God you are still standing, and these things we have to be eternally grateful to Him.  

  • Remember the verses where Jesus is sleeping in the boat with the huge waves and the horrific wind, and water going over the bow and filling the boats to the point the disciples thought they all would perish?  I think most of us look at how God is in control and we are to have faith that with Him all is possible.   That's true.

    But also, at least what I don't pick up on, is that He  told the waves and the winds to Be quiet and  to Be still.  And the waves and wind, because the listened, they instantly became calm, and relaxed, and very manageable.  

    And when we listen to Christ and are quiet and still, we become calm and filled with His peace.

    What better gift from Christ.  He says stop working on wanting to fix or find an end to the trial and I will give you what you want., My peace.  

    Where else can you sign up to do nothing, and then get your hearts desires?  Him, and His peace.

  • Remember the verses where Jesus is sleeping in the boat with the huge waves and the horrific wind, and water going over the bow and filling the boats to the point the disciples thought they all would perish?  I think most of us look at how God is in control and we are to have faith that with Him all is possible.   That's true.

    But also, at least what I don't pick up on, is that He  told the waves and the winds to Be quiet and  to Be still.  And the waves and wind, because the listened, they instantly became calm, and relaxed, and very manageable.  

    And when we listen to Christ and are quiet and still, we become calm and filled with His peace.

    What better gift from Christ.  He says stop working on wanting to fix or find an end to the trial and I will give you what you want., My peace.  

    Where else can you sign up to do nothing, and then get your hearts desires?  Him, and His peace.

  • But you already know that, hence your last sentence where you say you are being still to let God work.  I am sure this community will pray for your mother and job situation.  

    Sometimes these extra hardships like your mother's illness and the job situating, although they add stress, they also make the days go by faster and keep our mind off of our marital trial.  Our brains can only process so much at one time, well at least mine.  

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