Collaborate without boundaries

Not married. Not shacking. Will this pose a challenge for the Love Dare?.....

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Today I began the Love Dare challenge....Our story is complicated and one of a kind. We are not married. We have known one another for 14 years. We have never been in a committed relationship until 7 months ago. It was mainly me not being ready, afraid, prideful, immature, irresponsible, etc...During these 14 years I have been in 2 long term committed relationships, and had 3 children none of which are ours together. I would always keep in touch with him. He would always have his door open to me. He always treats me nice. He always thinks of me and my wellbeing. He loves my children as his own. He encourages me. He is there for me. He respects me. He loves me. I was not sure if I loved him or not until recently. The saying really is true, You do not know what you have until it is gone. I thought that I was emotionally tied to my ex. We have two children together. I do care about him. We had a terrible relationship. To God be the Glory because it brought me closer to Him and I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior and allowed Him into my life. I felt like I could not go on in my current relationship because I was still holding on to my past relationship. God showed me that I was not. In the process I was dealing with my teenage son who is going through a challenging time and is breaking my heart. I am in school. I work full time, and am raising four children. I try to stay active in my church or at least keep my children active. I feel so overwhelmed at times, along with burned out and extremely tired. He has been very understanding. Until recently....I went to the drug store to pick up my daughter's prescription one evening. There was a guy there that favored him, and he approached me by asking me if I was married. He said that I had a beautiful family and the guy that I was with was very blessed to have me. My daughter's joked about it because they too thought that he favored my guy. I believe in having an open relationship in that we tell each other everything. We trust one another. We are friends. I don't want to hurt you. You do not want to hurt me. Well...I told him that night when we were talking. He became upset and asked why did I even entertain the guy? I ended the conversation once that I seen he was getting upset. The next day he texted me just to see how I was and if I had completed my homework. I did not hear from him that night which was not the norm, nor the next day and night either, until I texted him....He said that I did not know what to say or what to do. I texted him back the next morning without greeting him and began using profane language and just pure anger came out. He never cursed or disrespected me. He said that I will not talk to him any kind of way. I showed him! Days later after not speaking, I realized that he is a man and I cannot speak to him any kind of way. Something that I was not used to in my past relationships with men that I have dated as well as men in my family. I felt like I was overwhelmed with the pressures of life, distracted, and confused. I did take him for granted. I do not want to lose him. He acts as if it is over. I apologized and poured out my heart to him. He said that I do not tell him anything and that I act like I do not love him, but he loves me. God knows best. I am trusting Him. If we are meant to be, then we will be. If we are not in God's will as a married couple, as a family, then I pray that we still become better in Christ because of the Love Dare, for God, ourselves, and our ordained, appointed and anointed mates.


On completion of Day 1, I texted him to speak and see how he is doing. He was very respectful and cordial. He asked how I was as well. We both told each other to have a good night. I wanted to say more but felt that it may lead into something else. We do not live together. I hope that does not pose a challenge. We are not married. I hope that does not pose a challenge.

  • Welcome.  There are a couple dares that should be only completed between married couples.  and there are plenty of people that do this when separated, or not living together.

    You will see that this is a journey, one between you and Christ, not you and him.  He will be used as a tool to mold you.  Do a dare a day, no more, ,no less.  He may need space for a while, and doing more than a dare a day may get in his space.

    Do not  read ahead in the book other than the appendix, especially about leading the heart.

  • It may get worse before it gets better.  But this serves purpose.  

    When doing  the dares, do them if at all possible, unless otherwise stated, in person, then via a phone call, lastly by text or email.  

    You are not married so you are not bound by a covenant like a married person, but yes, the Love Dare will be a good thing to do. especially when you do it to grow closer to Christ.

  • Singles participate in the Love Dare. Some dares are designed for married people, so let God guide you in those descisions

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