"LindaGDPFri, Feb 17 2017 1:10 PM
I am glad your surgery went well and you are recovering. I am sorry you got served and are heartbroken. The only advice I can offer is you have to decide what you want, Justin, then tell God and let Him fight for you. It's not going to be easy if you choose to fight for your marriage. It's especially hard to love someone who does not reciprocate that love, but Christ loved us even when we didn't love Him back. Who better to understand and care for us through this than Jesus, as He really knows how we feel? I will be praying for you, Justin. My heart knows how your heart feels."
I typed those words to Justin little knowing I would need to heed my own advice last night. Found myself face down in my closet sobbing because I got a pretty demeaning, hateful text from my ex. Because I have told him I still love him, he told me I need counseling and what a sad life I have lived for years and how he is working to regroup, take care of himself and seek a new wife because he deserves to be happy.
I felt I was at a crossroads in I had to choose which path to go down...I can't even wrap my head around a life without my husband, so for this time, there is only one choice. Today is just a sad day, but God is still faithful and He is right here like His word says.
Does anyone just get mind weary from battling the onslaught of negative thoughts geared toward making us angry and unforgiving?
I do. I am experiencing it right now. I feel like I am letting God down by having these feelings.
Yea, I don't think He feels like we're letting Him down. I am sure, because He loves us so much, He simply wishes we'd get it during these times that He will fight for us if we just be still. My head feels like it's going to explode trying to 'capture every thought to the obedience of Christ'. No wonder Paul said don't grow weary in well doing....This is wearing me out. And I have bronchitis on top of all this! This has just been a hard day for me....but God made it and I will find a way to rejoice in it!
Formyfamily, I will be praying for you. I cried for us all in the wee hours of the morning as I sat in my closet staring at the scraps of paper taped to my wall of people I pray for. Saw my little yellow sticky note that has "All the marriages represented on the Love Dare Blog" and I just cried for us all.
I do thank you for your prayers. When the mood strikes, go ahead and cry those tears to God. But also, at other times, rejoice in God for all of us too that we have chosen to follow His will in standing for out marriages, and we are all on a journey with Christ.
Sometimes the burdens feel heavy, but as time goes on the burdens lighten because our endurance in Christ has been strengthened.
When we are restless in the trial that means we aren't resting in Him. He offers rest to all those that go to Him.
Linda what is kind of funny in this is the more we offer words to others on this site, the more our own words get thrown in our face when we want to just let the flesh win for just a moment.
Yes I do but try to remind myself that God is in control and he understands how we are feeling and he does forgive us. He loves us unconditionaly. If I focus on our lord when I have these negative thoughts, I tend to forget them. Praying for you
Thank you all. Today is a much better day. lol Yep Tim, you are so right. Kinda makes you walk the talk during those times, huh? I am hanging in there. Got another text from him today and sad to say, I did respond in anger, but I spoke truth. Well, that doesn't justify the anger, but I've prayed and moved on.
I have been praying for conviction to just rain down on my husband and I think I'm actually bearing the brunt of his misery. The more I thought about why would anyone get angry and spout off demeaning things when someone is simply telling them they are loved has to be because it makes them feel guilty for their choices and they then have to justify their choices.
Could be he just doesn't like me very much anymore, but would like to believe the Holy Spirit is bringing him under conviction.
Anyway...thank you all for your prayers. The bronchitis is even some better today!