I wouldn't know how to perform this dare with him as he communicates with me very little. I have made decisions on how to communicate with himin the last six months and am still holding to them. They are as follows:
1) I will listen. I will listen without interruption. I will listen without negative facial expressions and/or defensive body language.
2) I will speak softly, with purpose, and with respect.
3) I will not use sarcasm or accusatory, condescending tones and/or words. (i.e. respect, again)
Every day, it seems he is further and further away...and i seem to be letting it continue because, again, it's in God's hands. I do not talk about my divorce or what I'm doing with anyone. I think my friends and family worry that I am just in denial. I worry, too. I keep praying. It's not for them to understand.
I know we arent to look at the upcoming dares, but I have, and there are some that ask us to do something together. Ugh. He wouldn't spend time with me if his life depended on it. I will ask/ make a suggestion though as it is the dare. But I know it will be met with a refusal. Prayers of strength to handle the rejection, please. Today, I simply offered to pick our daughter up from practice so he could have time to workout outside. No response.
**One of my daughters stayed with me tonight. She is usually a joyful child, but with circumstances of late, it has been difficult. She cried tonight and said it was unfair having to go back and forth between mommy and daddy. She didnt like it. I called my husband about it and he doesnt know what to do. He thinks "logically things are better." Ive been up all night sick with this. I prayed for protection of my family, and for His wisdom, guidance, and His peace in the situation. My parents have stonewalled the situation, my kids are volatile, and my husband routinely is unresponsive and indifferent. It's coming down around my ears. Reading How To Pray and The Healing Gifts of the Spirit. I must stand strong during this.
One thing though, during the convo, husband did agree to meet for lunch...which is the dare when we are just to spend time together.
God wants us to share.... And you should. This situation, your story is a testimony to those around you. They may not understand things, but it is you that is the testimony and Christ will guide that for you. This journey is not just for you, but it is for you to plant the seeds for Christ. What better way to do that than to be out there and being the testimony?
How are you so sure of rejection? This is not trusting Christ. This is you knowing everything.... LOL... If you are going about your dares with that attitude, then what do you expect? It is almost like going through the motions.
Take each dare, pray about it dwell on it. What is Christ doing through this dare? If you get rejected, did it humble you in some way that you learned something about your relationship with Christ?
Christ will open the doors that are needed. But you must trust Him.
I agree with Sean. Most of my family and friends did not understand why I was holding on to my marriage and felt i could do better by myself but that was not my hearts request. I chose to stay and as hard as it was, I had to learn to trust Christ to see me thru.
I would recomend you pray for God to soften your husband heart and for a pleasant atmosphere when ever you meet. This goes a long way when there is children involved. They need to see that your two are not enemies, but that you are just going thru a period of disagreement that makes it difficult for the two o fyour to stay together for now.
Depending on the age of youe kids you can tell them mommy and daddy is going thru some tough time but are working it out and that you are trusting God to bring you together again. You do not have to go into detail but you cannot just let them go back and forth with the fear that their family might split. You will be suprised at the power of a child's prayer. They pray without selfish motives and with unshaken faith. Ask them to pray for the restoration of the family. This is how we teach our children a living faith. They will know even at a young age how to trust God in difficult situations.
Be blessed and remember, we live by the word of our confession. Speak life and expect in faith that He has done it for you.
Hebr11:1"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see"