Collaborate without boundaries

New Here and Very, Very Discouraged

  • Comments 7

I'm new here. Not sure if anyone will read this or even care.


I am feeling very down. This is day 9 of the Love Dare and up until last night I was feeling positive and closer to God even though my husband wasn't showing real signs of wanting to stay in this marriage. We were separated once before 2 years ago, and although he hasn't left physically this time, he has left emotionally. He says he is tired of our cycle. One minute we're doing good and the next we aren't. I told him it's because we haven't got to the root of the problem yet and just because we "get into it" and fuss doesn't mean we should just leave each other. He said we could take with a pastor, but he says he's probably going to feel the same way he does now and he's tired of it. I've being praying fervently for the past week now and I almost feel like giving up. Like there's no hope in continuing this marriage if he doesn't want to work on us. Marriage to me meant a "lifetime", not just a thing to do. I am beyond devastated, but maybe it's time to let go now. Maybe this is God's way of telling me, "It's over".

  • Hi and welcome. God never promised us an easy life and/or marriage. My wife and I have seperated, she moved out bout a month and a half ago. I havent given up I still wear my wedding ring. Wat ever u do dont give up even if it looks like there is no hope, God does things in his time for his timming is perfect. We need to be patient and to be still as he works in our lives. It is very hard to be still as I finde it very hard as I watched my wife leave me and I couldnt do anything about it. One thing to remember is that God is in control and we need to let him do his work, trust in him for God is good. I still struggle but I know God will never leave me.  Also, God will use your situation as a way to bring you closer to him, just as he has done with me and with everyone on this site, I have become closer to God than I was before. I hope this has helped you in some way and that I have made sence im not really good at explaining myself properly. Will be be praying for you.

     Again welcome .

  • Thank you, Robcap for your response. I've been spending a lot more time with God, but I'm very frustrated that my husband and I are back at this point once again. I'll never understand how easy it is for him to just consider throwing away our marriage. I took our vows seriously. Lots of couples argue, but you have to find time to work things out and not leave God out of the relationship. I pray that your wife opens her heart and turns back to you, so you can work things out.

  • I'm glad you found this part of the site.  I did respond to you again in the other section.  Post often.  

  • I remind myself that I married my hubs for better and for worse.  And worse it has been but I chose that commitment in front of God.

    Also God will use situations that appear hopeless to show His Glory ...and in His time not ours.

    Find some verses to remind yourself...Lean not on your own understanding but in His ways your path will be made straight.  His ways are higher than our ways.

  • Tim,

    Thank you so much for your encouragement. It means a lot.

  • Par,

    Thank you for responding to my post. Proverbs 3:5-6 is scripture that I have been repeating for awhile now. It really helps. Yesterday, I was just very frustrated after my husband was speaking negatively to me, but this morning I am better. I asked God's forgiveness of me returning to my flesh yesterday. Today is day 10 for me... I am trusting that God is working in the midst. I pray that God restores your marriage, as well.

  • Hey sis. I hear you, and kinda know what you're experiencing, though my wife never physically left before. However, she has mentioned separation, but thankfully is still home. One of the hardest parts about these marital trials is to lead your own heart. I've battled with my emotions throughout, but you need to find your medium, and stand on God's Word where it says, "Let not your heart be troubled (Jhn. 14:1). It's very difficult, but keep trusting that God will have the victory in your marriage. You feel better knowing you did everything you could to save your marriage than just giving up. Trust me.

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