Collaborate without boundaries

Still day 5

  • Comments 3

Well still day 5. I am struggling a lot. I texted him but still no answer. I wanted to texted him back and tell him it was important to me to say something but I didn't. Is like he doesn't see me as a human being with feelings. 

I am frustrated and upset. I dont even know if he got the egift I sent. Is so hard not to say anything. But I will control myself and refrain from texting him again. 

I am going to go see what can I do to entertain myself. Hopefully I will learn some patience when this is over

  • Have you looked into a women's bible study group at your church or near you.  Spending time with other believers (of the same sex) did wonders for me and allowed me to spend time in fellowship while allowing me to take my mind off of my circumstances.  Early on I also befriended an Elder from our church that he allowed me to come over once a week and just sit and talk about whatever while also praying for our spouses.  For now, put the phone down, do not look at it with expectations and every time you feel that energy build up inside of you where you feel like bursting then turn your attention to God and sing out loud.  Stand in your house with the music turned way up and throw your hands up to God in praise.

    PS:  You are already learning patience.  Let this trial have its perfect effect in you.  James 1:2-4

  • I sent egift yesterday (Day 3): No acknowledgement.... I called today (Day 4): No answer...  Like your husband, my wife is being selfish right now.... . I feel if I contact her to see if she got the egift, then I am being needy. Me being needy is as bad as her selfishness.... You will find out if he got the egift eventually. Just have patience and pray (I know, easier said than done).... And I recommend you do not attempt more than one contact per day, unless you get a positive response. Constant rejection hurts, and it really emboldens the other person to be meaner.

    Sunny's suggestion for a women's study group is great. Be careful to not confide in men (other than Church Elders, or family). Since we are online and anonymous, I share some things. But, I have only confided with a select group of men I can trust.  Always wear your wedding ring. We need to abide by Matthew 5:27-28.

    Personally, I do not feel giving a wayward spouse "space" is helpful. I think it can give both spouses used to the idea of separate lives. But we cannot make them come home and honor their vows. And I feel if we let a wayward spouse back without some type of repentance it is a disservice to the marriage.

  • again, just as Sunny said.  It's good to have some entertainment, but even better to fill some of your time in fellowship, extra prayer, the bible.

    Have no expectation or concern if he received the gift.

    Do a dare a day, no more.  Any more will be you trying to take control, trying to find comfort from him vs comfort from Christ, and will get in the space he thinks he needs.  Any extra attempts at communication will drive him further to be closed to you.

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