Today started off in a hurry, I need to get to directing really early. As I was on my way I started praying and spending time in the word of God. I get here and realize that i have 2hours before the rehearsal begins so I take time to listen to music off...

THE REALITY OF HAVING LOST ARA HIT ME HARD, THE FACT THAT I CAN DO NOTHING HURTS EVEN MORE. LIFE GOES ON AND I'M STILL STANDING. a PART OF ME WANTS TO SHAKE HIM AND MAKE HIM SEE WHAT HE IS DOING TO A GOOD RELATIONSHIP BUT I KNOW THAT HE STILL WILL...

Round 2, Day 48… Thursday Well I think I posted up yesterday’s entry to soon, Ara and I had a bit of contact. I prayed about getting contact with Ara and got a yes then I asked if we could have the conversation that I have been trying to avoid and got...

For as long as the Lord wants me to do this I am willing. Today Jesus gave me new hope through a friend of mine. We sat and prayed for a long time, then we took a moment and juststarted talking about how things are going. I asked Jesus if I could tell...

I need to be very honest with everybody here. I do not feel like I am where I should be in terms of leaving everything to God. He put up a status asking somebody to ‘marry’ him and I went crazy. I did not go off at him but he sensed that something...

Round 2, DAY 5…Prayer, prayer and more prayer Well today I woke up upset, I had a bad dream and in it Ara was telling me that he has reconnected with an ex of his. Ah that was not a good dream, I did not think about it long but I was missing Ara...

SUNDAY Well today was an interesting day. I woke up and thought about a post that I had read saying that the way my partner is treating me is in line with how I’m treating Christ. Oh that spoke to me, thank you Jason for the lessons that I’m...

Well there was more to write about. I was walking with another guy today and as we parting I bumped into Ara’ best friend. I realised that I need to tread very carefully on who I walk around with and how I am around people of the opposite sex. The...

Wow today was a very long day. I’m just so tired. My older sister came back from France today so we organised a small party for her, had the whole family and some friends over. I called Ara in the morning after spending some time in prayer and thought...

Well today was a difficult day. I started it with NO strength. I woke up depressed out of my mind, I was down and my body refused to do anything, it just hurt all over. My heart was sick, Yeah I needed God badly. I tried to pray and nothing came out so...

Well today is the beginning of my second round. I'm really excited about this round. Applying everything that Jesus had been teaching me over the past 40 days is going to be amazing. I learned so much the last round, this round I want to get even...

I woke up and had a lovely prayer session with the Almighty Three, lol I love that title for them haha. Anyway Jesus tells me to go watch tbn when I was done. I switch on and it is Joyce Meyer teaching on weariness. Wow, what a blessing, through her message...

Day 39… Tuesday I woke up today and felt the presence of the Lord in my room. I was told to get my things and get ready to pray and have warfare in my room. This is the second time in one week that this happens. Anyway I spent time with the Lord...

Today I was woken up by the Lord at 2am, I was told to pray and as I was praying I fell asleep, I was just so tired. I could sense that the Lord wanted me to pray for Ara and myself and that He may begin to prepare the man I’m going to marry…...

Frday Yesterday could’ve easily been a tough day but the Lord kePT me and gave me peace throughout the day, even when the venom came in every direction. I woke up to a voice note from Ara saying that he has done everything he could to stand for...

I am really struggling with posting my entries daily, the site is killing me here (sad face…). Anyway to today my dare was done without me even having read the dare. I spent the day with one of my close friends, I wanted to be with Ara but I chose...

Yesterday could’ve easily been a tough day but the Lord kePT me and gave me peace throughout the day, even when the venom came in every direction. I woke up to a voice note from Ara saying that he has done everything he could to stand for us and...

God answered a prayer today when I aasked to have somebody to talk to about this whole thing. I asked Him if He would allow me to talk to the youth pastor and the pastors wife about everything that is happening. Upon speaking to both of them separately...

So today is love meets sexual needs, yeah...that did not happen. We are not married and its not something that can be done now. What I thought of doing instead was having an intimate moment with him, where he and I just enjoy each other without any interruptions...

Day 31… Leaving issues Today I did not have much contact with Ara that’s fine though until the Lord dealt with me on my reason for choosing not to talk to him. Jesus told me that I’m still holding onto Ara, (even Jesus is saying this...

Well since I did not engage with Saturday’s dare I wanted to spend some time in prayer and really give things up to God. I went to church ready to sing and do worship when I find out that Ara said that he will not be coming in. Ah I got so irritated...

I did not see Ara today, I was still mad at him from the day before. I spent a good while wondering if I should call him in the morning but was told not to, I listened. Lately when I call he simply does not pick up or respond to any of my texts so I have...

The past two days (wed and thurs) have been crazy hey! Day 28 The Lord tells me not to put my hope in Ara to make my birthday special instead I should ask Him to take over my birthday and have HIM make it special for me. The sacrifice for the day was...