is still Faithful
is a choice, not a feeling. It is an initiated action, not a knee-jerk
reaction. Choose today to be committed to love even if your spouse has
lost most of their interest in receiving it. Say to them today in words
similar to there, "I love you. Period. I choose to love you
even if you don't love me in return."
Wow, not going to lie this is getting slightly
difficult—day two of no contact with my husband after seeing him Tuesday and
Wednesday. I realized this morning that God now has me on another bend in the road—a
bend that is taking me to a whole other level of patience, grace, and understanding.
It is not just my husband this is all affecting, which I was reminded of today.
I was also reminded that God having me not contact my husband is Him doing more
work without me getting in the way.
I was blessed with an encouraging counseling
session this morning. Even though I did not get to express today’s dare
directly to my husband, I was able to reiterate my commitment of love for him
to my counselor. I went from seeing him every week to every other week, so each
session I will bring my journal entries with me, so I am sure to catch him up
on everything. This session I was really excited to share the update because of
what took place on Tuesday. I made sure to not give it away when I got there. I
started first with my two weeks ago entry and worked my way to Tuesday.
Typically I will just use the written entries to jog my memory as I am talking
to him, but when I got to Tuesday’s entry – I had to read it because I knew I
was going to get shaky due to how
emotional (in a good way) it makes me. I started reading it and noticed about
half way into it my counselor was getting teary eyed. It seriously melted my
heart! In the four months of seeing him I have never seen him get that
emotional. After I caught him up to yesterday he told me that it is so
refreshing to see someone abandon themselves to Christ as I have —to show His
unconditional love for my husband that Christ has for us that often does not
make sense to people. I really needed to hear that today. I have questioned why
God would choose me for all of this. What makes me so special? I don’t deserve
it. However, I am so thankful for it and now welcome it with open arms. I
honestly am excited each day I wake to see what He has in store for me next. No,
it is not easy what so ever, but I know that Christ knows what is BEST for me.
No need to question the whys or the whens. Easier said than done, yes, but all
I have to do is look back at where I was to where I am now and am reminded – He
has carried me this far – He is not letting go. No doubt, my trust remains in
Him. That is where the patience, the grace, the peace, the happiness pours
“If love is to be like Christ’s, it must love
even when its overtures are returned unwanted. And for your love to be like
that, it must be His love to begin with. You can give undeserved love to your
spouse because God gave UNDESERVED love to you—repeatedly, enduringly. Love is often expressed the most when it is
deserved the least."
I continue to pray for Him to fill me with the
kind of love only He can provide, then purpose to give it to my husband in a
way that reflects my gratefulness to God for loving me. That is the beauty of
redeeming love. That’s the power of faithfulness!
There are many of us on this Love Dare journey –
this song attests to what we are doing—inspired and challenged to live an
all-out, sell-out for Christ and not just going through the “motions.”
Jenn, I replied to the post in the dares.