41 Love is patient
the past couple of days, I have been reflecting on the past dares.
The wonderful conversation I had with my wife even though it was a
roller coaster for her. One thing that I forgot to mention, she told
me to not get discouraged. The main thing I have been thinking on is
the dares. Why am I doing them. The first round was for my
marriage. I know I manipulated the dares (thanks Sean). This round
is about selfishness. Stick with me here. I am going to focus more
on my walk with Christ. The dares will be completed as they are
written. So Love is Patient. It took me several days to complete
this dare. For me it was not about what the book says. It was
patience on my part. Patience for Christ to work. That it matters
not about the time I want but that His timing is what matters because
it is perfect. So I started to write my vows to complete the dare
but stopped. The dare was completed by the conversation I had with
my wife. Maybe this round or the next or next or next (you get the
point here?) I will finish writing my vows. The timing is not right
to write! There you have it, love is patient.
Praise God you realized your motives for the first round. Mine were the same too. I told myself this is the last thing I can do to save my marriage. If it works great. If not I will know I did everything I could. Wow how crazy was that? I wonder if by you not actually writing them out it's your way to control things. I'm sure Sean will speak to this. When will be the right time? I think we have to rely on God to complete the dare no matter what. Of course we will often fall short or fail when we rely on our own strength. It's awesome that this round you are selfish and it's about you and Christ!
During my conversation with my wife on the night of dare 40, I spoke my vows to her. She questioned everything I had done wrong to her. Lots of why did you do its. All I could say was that saying sorry seems to little and the only thing that can show that I am truly sorry is my actions from here on out. So the course of the talk I spoke my vows to her. The dare is complete I just didn't write them down. As I tried to actually write them it seemed like I was manipulating the dare by doing so.
Oh I got it now. That was probably harder to do. Dunno if I could verbally say them. Kudos to you! Something I heard once that really spoke to me..... "don't tell him about Christ..... BE Christ to him". Thats exactly what you are doing. Awsome and amazing!
I smell control....takes one to know one. ;)
She told you not to get discouraged? So what does that tell you about not only your relationship with Christ but with your wife? If she isnt much of a believer, why would she want you to keep going? Only good things can happen from this brother.
Control huh? I struggled with it hard. The more I sat and tried to write my vows the more control I grabbed. So I let go. I thought about the meaning of this journey and laid it at His feet! Still so tempting cause we know best don't we, knows one?
Jason, what it tells me is exactly what Libby threw in my face CONTROL. Its a trail. Do I gain control or do I lay it at His feet? Hence my patience and selfishness in round 2. There is lots of love there. Lots of conviction. Time to let the Master work and me step aside. The only thing I can do is work to build my relationship with Him.
"For me it is not about what the book says." <-- This is what I was referencing. Not judging ,as I am the last one to do so ever.
Be careful, so many times we manipulate a dare and have the perfect justification. Well in our minds anyway! Pray on it...
And this time really focus on what the journey really is. Your relationship with Christ through the tools He provides.
I know, no judgement Libby ;).
Sean, I had to reflect hard and pray on this. It took several days. I am focusing on placing it ALL at His feet. Focusing on relationship with Christ. I have changed for the better. It is time to let Him cement those changes.
Thank you for your inspiration.