Collaborate without boundaries

Today was a good day

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Day something nice for her and expect nothing in return. I did a lot of thinking on this one. I thought about buying her flowers or a card, but then I thought no I want to do something more meaningful something that would actually help her something that would make her day a little easier. So this is what I did, after work and picking the kids up from school I came home. We made small talk about how our days went which was nice. It was nice because we got to take a little break from arguing and bickering about our feelings towards each other and the divorce papers. She started making dinner and we continued to talk. She told me about her plans to clean the carpets the following day and how she needed the kids to clean their disaster area rooms. She also told me that she wouldn't be eating with us because her mom and a couple of friends had invited her to go eat with them. She was running a bit late so she rushed off and I finished up cooking and got the kids fed. I tried to get the kids to clean their rooms while I did my day 2 dare (do something nice for her). I decided to clean up her bedroom, make the bed, clean off nightstands, pick up dirty laundry, put away clean laundry, clean up her make-up stand,take out the trash and vacuum the floor. To be completely honest I was a bit nervous when she got home because I didn't want to turn something good that I did for her to turn into a bad thing because she thinks that I was just snooping through her stuff. Luckily it didn't go bad and she actually said thank you and appreciated it.... I even think I saw a bit of a smile. The only thing that didn't work out was the kids didn't clean their rooms. I knew that since they didn't do it that my wife would end up doing it herself and I didn't think that would be fair to make her have to do it on top of having to run errands all morning, cleaning the carpets then heading off to her 2nd shift job. So I decided to take it upon myself to let her chill out and relax while I cleaned the house myself. It took me over 4 hours to get it all done, my legs and feet hurt and I was dead ass tired and afterwards, but I must admit that it was definitely worth it to see her smile and it felt good to know that I was able to make her day a little easier. I feel that that's my job as her husband to make her happy, pick up the slack and to make her life as easy as I possibly can.....somewhere along the way I lost sight of that.

  • When you take time to see what you should do for a dare and also when the dare takes a lot of effort, such as you displayed, that is when the most growth comes.  And stretching in cleaning in aches and pains for  four hours will make the next time you see a little mess that needs cleaned up not to be so bad to  take  care of for her.

  • Awesome story James. I know that even though you were worn out the feeling afterward was well worth it. I'm up to day 12 and expecting divorce papers very soon but I keep going with no expectations. I get a "Thank you" every now and then along with an "I'm not staying married to you." It hurts but I know in the end God will be there for me. He knows my heart and will take care of me. I can say that I took the opening warning of the Love Dare book seriously and committed to it and it is actually more difficult than I thought. It is very difficult to show unconditional love. More difficult than I imagined but I am seeing things happen around me that shows God is at work. I'm just praying that my wife will see that someday too. Good luck in the days to come.

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