This by far is my favorite lesson and I feel like I need to read it everyday to remind myself to LIVE in the Appreciate Room. It's so easy to go into the Depreciation Room and lock myself in there. I Praise GOD I don't live anymore. He lifted me out of that pit of hell. So I tried to tell him what I appreciated about him but he was busy on his phone so I waited but I think I was a little irritated and pissy. He asked me if I was going to tell him something positive and told me he didn't want to hear it. I told him I just was thinking about something and wanted to share it with him. So finally I was able to tell him that I appreciated that he was patient because I'm not. He asked why I was telling him this and I told him I was just thinking about it because it was our anniversary for when our relationship started 16 years ago with a phone call. I was not sure if I should just tell him it's from the Love Dare. He sees me with the book so I thought he would put it together. The positive list was just a little easier to do. The negative list was shorter this time which is good.
Irritation shows your lack of patience. I learned not too long ago that lack of patience with Him is big time sin.
Was your thank you genuine or was it forced? Your husband is questioning whether it is a genuine thing.
He sees your book, but maybe he doesnt see yet? If he does know you are doing the dares, he probably was testing you to see what you would say. Then he really will think its not genuine and you are doing it just to get him back............no matter what the real reason may be. Its then that your actions must speak much louder than words.
No it wasn't a question of being genuine. Although that is a great point. He has always been uncomfortable with compliments. He cannot accept them. He lies and downplays things in his life because he's so humble and thinks negatively about himself. Now he feels like he's being punished for what he did by God and I have tried to explain that God doesn't punish us. He also says stuff like he doesn't deserve any blessings because of what he did. I tell him God loves us no matter what we do. I know he has seen some positive changes in me. We have talked about the LD and I have shared how it's changed my life.
Yeah I'm working on the patience stuff. I think it was expectation stuff too and pride which is all not good. I am grateful God is working on this within me and molding me. It's much better then it used to be but still a challenge.
Thank you for this! I was just posting on my day 51 how torn I feel. I have a million questions running through my head, but now I see that it is because I'm stuck in the Depreciation room. Time to get out of the Depreciation Room and get into the Appreciation Room!
There is a chance that he is so entangled in the world that every little thing you do positive is a conviction. Then there is also the situation that if attention has always been negative then that is the most accepted....
Peaches I'm so glad it helped. I have lived in that Depreciation Room for the longest time and the Love Dare has taught me that the BEST ROOM to live in is the Appreciation Room! I reside there much more now. Praise GOD! Sometiems I do visit that other room but I have to remind myself to cover the walls with "Covered in Love!"
Sean......yeah I asked him if he thought I was not being genuine and he said no I never said that. I told him I just wanted to make sure. He often asks me why I am saying things and who told me to say that and what's the trigger etc. I think ti's both things you mentioned but perhaps more of the conviction. It also is just how he is with accepting compleiments. He just can't. It's so hard for him by anyone.