Collaborate without boundaries

February 4, 2018

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Not much happened yesterday. I texted my kids a little just to ask how they were doing. Caleb worried me a little because he only texted me back one word replies. I asked him if he was doing ok and he said "yes." He is usually more talkative so I'm concerned about him. Becca and Trinity went to their friend's houses and they were doing good. Later in the day Becca said my wife picked her and her friend up and took them to the mall along with Aleigha and Allison.

When they got home Aleigha called me around 9:30pm. I talked to her for a few minutes then Allison wanted to talk to me. Allison is five years old and the first thing she said was "I miss you really bad daddy." She was crying and I had to calm her down. I told her I would see her soon. Then she started whispering and said she was hiding from mommy. After about 15 minutes I heard my wife telling her to come out of the closet where she was hiding. She was crying that she wanted to talk to me but my wife made her hang up the phone. Allison told me that mommy doesn't want her calling me. It makes me so sad that the love of my life now feels this hatred for me. My therapist said Love is more powerful than Hate and the Bible definitely states that so I will take this pain and turn it around into love.

Allison keeps asking me why I can't come home and I can't lie to my children and I can't tell her that it's MY choice to stay away from her. I continue to tell her I'm just not allowed to come home. Luckily she has never asked me why I'm not allowed. I would have to tell her that mommy is mad at me. I don't know what else to tell her without it being a lie.

Aleigha called me just now. I talked to her and Allison. They told me that Amber went to pick up Becca and Trinity, who went to stay with friends last night. They are all getting ready for church. It still confuses me that my wife goes to church but I'm praying that God is using this to work on her. Maybe something will click in her and she will realize that her behavior is wrong.

Aleigha told me that our Kindle Fire is missing. Trinity was using it and it disappeared from her room. I'm 100% certain that Nick took it. He is more than likely using it for Snapchat and contacting those people that I don't want him contacting. I told everyone he was not permitted to use any electronics and Aleigha tells me he is using the Xbox 360, the Kindle Fire and my mother-in-laws phone. Since I am not permitted to see them or be a parent I can't stop him. He is using my wife for his own purposes right now. Caleb, the oldest child, told me he is afraid to tell Nick to stay away from his things because he is afraid Nick will steal or destroy his stuff.

Aleigha also told me that Amber took her to the mall and let her get her nails done and bought her a new pair of shoes and a new pair of boots. This is very unlike my wife. She never buys the kids anything from the mall. Everything she ever buys them is from Goodwill. That's just how my wife is. She is a very thrifty shopper. That's one thing I love about her. I just feel like she is trying to butter the kids up so they will forget how she has acted in the last few months.

  • I imagine she is just trying to butter the kids up.   Because she has to justify to them she is an okay person doing okay things.  

    This trial of suffering is purifying you.  It is bringing you more into God's will.  Be joyful if you can right now, knowing you are closer to God than you ever were before.  

    Be in His peace even in this trial. Your kids and wife will see it.  And at some point if not already they will want what you have, Christ and His peace.

  • When I am weak I am strong. Sometimes it just doesn't feel like it though.

  • And I bet Jesus didn't feel very strong either as He was being whipped, fell caring HIs cross, and then being nailed to it.  But He was, and He's strong in you.  Trust Him.

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