Collaborate without boundaries

R2 Day 7 Love Believes the Best- Done

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I took my old list of positive things and added to it. I'm sure I could continue to add and add. It's pretty easy to think of positive things about the person you married. I did forget to contact her and tell her about one of the positive things. I spent a lot of time with the kids this weekend, taking them to a concert and a college basketball game. It was a lot of driving and traveling and was very time consuming.

The negative list was short like last time but quite different. When I finished and thought about it there was nothing on the list from the first time. The first negative list was full of nonsense. Small things that don't make a difference in marriage. This time it focused on real things like how I feel she's given up on God, family, and me. And how her behavior is harming the kids and teaching them the wrong values. New things that I have to forgive her for. Which I must continuously do and hope that she repents and stops. Jesus says forgive seven time seventy times. Easier said than done but I'm on the narrow road so I don't have a choice. Thank God for that.

There was very little communication between us this weekend. She hasn't been home since Wednesday night. Four days. She did call me because she is still looking for basketball shoes for our daughter and hasn't found any. Our daughter was complaining about it to her, and she called me telling me to talk to our daughter and tell her that she may not be able to get exactly what she wants. I just hate that we can't function as a family. She's telling me to tell the kids this and that. The kids are asking where she is constantly. They say "We're not a real family" a lot and it kills me because we could be. With just a little bit of effort.

She was planning on coming home last night but texted me and said she would just come home at 6:45am and get the kids on the bus. I asked her where she was staying and she said at her girl friends house that she works with. Then the school announced that there would be a two hour delay so when I got up this morning she texted me and asked if that was still the case. I told her it was and she said she hadn't left her friends yet (which is about an hour away) because she was afraid the roads were bad. Then I got a call that school was cancelled so she said she was just going to see if her mom would come stay with the kids while she went straight to work.

I suppose she is coming home tonight. We have marriage therapy scheduled at 6pm but it will probably be just me as usual. I invited her but she texted me back talking about something else instead of what I asked her. She said the roads are terrible and our daughter has therapy at 3pm.

Me: I will be taking Aleigha and Allison with me to marriage therapy at 6:00. I would really like for you to come. I believe you need my help and I know I need yours. It's never too late. I love you.

Her: The roads are terrible. Trinity's supposed to have therapy at 3.

She never answers my questions. There has to be something psychological about that.

Many times I stop and think how childish this situation really is. Two adults that can't get their acts together. I couldn't act like a real husband for years, now my wife wants to run away from our problems. This is the stuff you see in middle school.

  • I'm kind of laughing at your description of the stuff of middle school.  That's how I thought of us, two grade school kids that always picked on each other and didn't let go of grudges.  

    But our wives got to the point they felt they couldn't take it any longer.  And now it is our turn to suffer their wrath.  What's the bible say, better to live on a rooftop than to have to deal with an angry wife?  Something like that.  

    But, our wives need us, to see our testimony and us shining Christ's light.  Because the world's easy way out is attractive.  But as you shine the light of Christ, the attractiveness and glitter of the world's ways begins to look faded and rusted.  

    Keep being in Christ, letting Him work in her.

  • YOu see how easy it is to fix this.  For her to grow up and be of Christ.  So easy, but, they don't see that, just as we didn't see that for so long before this trial began.  so, keep giving her time to find Christ like you did.  Something may bring her to a breaking point.

  • Pretty cool way your negative list changed from round one to round two.  

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