Collaborate without boundaries

Thy will be done

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Well, after checking the mail today and not receiving any notification about the court date, I decided to send DH a text. I told him that I haven't received anything in the mail yet and haven't heard from him and that I had called the courthouse. I told him that I would like to see him again before it's final if that would be OK with him. He replied that I had mail, insurance EOB's, and candy at his house. That seemed like an odd response to me.  Like he was dodging/ignoring the elephant in the room.  I told him that he was welcome to bring the stuff over to my house. He told me that would be fine, for me to just tell him when.  I told him to choose what works best for him. He said he could anytime and any day. I told him to just pick something and let me know. I haven't heard back from him as to a time that works for him.

So, I gather from his response that he has been made aware of the court date.  This will probably be the last time that I see him before the divorce is final. I pray that God will guide me, help me to continue to love this man to the end, and put His words into my mouth.  There are still so many questions I would like to ask, so many things I would like to say.  How do you choose the last words that you may ever say to someone?  I have really struggled all morning with "thy will be done".  I know that God's plans are good. I know that he is in control. I know that if this divorce occurs, God is sovereign in it. I know all of this. I know that Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane struggled and wrestled with the fact that he didn't want to go through what he was about to go through either.  I want God's will to be done, because I know that his will is the wisest and best. But at the same time, I don't want this.  Not at all.
  • Jesus was scared in the Garden of Gethsemane. I guess it's ok to be scared. Who knows what the future holds except God?

    I know that God can bring DH back. I know the conviction has to be unbearable.

  • He may not fully understand that he broke the code of marriage in his DNA until after the d happens if it happens.  And then when all is settled and there is less and less mail to keep him in touch with you, he may see what he truly did. and then he may feel shame, regret, and pain.  And he may come to God and you at that time.  And that's when he may want to hear more of your testimony that you have built.

    ]And that may be when he understands why you are happy when you should be miserable and he is sad when he should be the happy one. And then it may occur to him that Christ really is the answer.  

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