I am going to the dare again as I am still learning how this new attitude is affected by the things of this world. But I am going to take a break to go through 'Resolutions for Men.' (based on the new movie Courageous)

The first time through the book I failed at this dare. I wrote out our wedding vows from the wedding video. I printed them. And did nothing with them except leave them in the room. I failed post them and to renew them. To look at them through new eyes...

The first time I approached this dare, my hopes were that it would change her. Move her to see how much she means to me. I know this cause I wrote that this dare might be seen as a manipulation by her. My fears of manipulation were based in my hopes....

She dreams of starting her own business. She dreams of going to Australia/New Zealand. What can I do right now to fulfill these? I can start saving for that trip to Australia/New Zealand I can get her the domains for the internet to protect her business...

There has been an epiphany. And I keep having them. Everyday is something new. I keep getting in the way of the path Christ wants me to walk. I keep on sinning. I keep on trying to put myself first. My actions are not putting myself first, but my attitude...

It is hard to believe that 40 days have gone by since the last time this dare was asked. The first time I did not journal what I did - just what I was feeling. Here is how this dare as changed me: 'Commit to reading the Bible every day. Find a devotional...

I have sought several counselors. Our pastor, an older couple who I respect very much for their marriage. Some of our friends have strong marriages and they are trying hard to model marriage for us. (thank you) We are in secular counseling. I have good...

Another hard day. We had church this morning, and the person she is having the affair with is in our praise band. (She sings, I play guitar.) I get to see him every other week (as he only shows up at church when she is there.) One thing that was different...

We had a discussion today about planning for daycare for our youngest child. It went well we collaborated well on his needs.

This is the one dare that I most dreaded doing again, as my wife has turned herself off to me. I wrestled with this dare all day. How was I to do this? Was I just asking for more pain by doing this? I prayed for strength and once again the Spirit provided...

Oneness. I longed for this, but that longing was in error. It is not something that I get. It is something that I am, something that I became when I was married. It is not what I do, or if I mistrust, or if I long for physical intimacy. O my God. Have...

There are two areas of disunity at the moment. One is trust. We do not trust each other. I do not trust her as to her motivations. (aka the affair) She doesn't trust me to talk to me, afraid of what my reactions will be. (Afraid I might get angry...

I can thank a good friend for this reflection. I have been taking these dares to become a better Christian, and husband and father. These are who I am, who I am called to be. But where I fail in this in our current relationship is that I still do not...

This is what my wife needs from me: Instead of being critical, I need to be curious Instead of getting worked up, I need to be calm. Instead of proclaiming judgement, I can choose to be compassionate. Instead of worrying and fretting about the future...

At its core, love is a personal responsibility and improvement of self, not a demand of others. Love encourages but does not expect. Concentrating on where others fall short is a past time that we all partake in. I unfortunately do this everyday in some...

Love is responsible. Wow, today was so much easier to do the second time around. Once you start owning up to your mistakes, it becomes easier to continue to do so. I am sorry to say that it was pretty easy to find things to be responsible for. I asked...

1) Forgiveness. You may think that forgiveness is a gift you give someone else, usually after they say they are sorry. But real forgiveness is a gift you give yourself and regardless of whether someone says they are sorry. When you hold someone with anger...

In today's dare I will reaffirm the covenant that I wrote on the first day 24: I have been filled with lust, but what i seek is not sex, but instead love, a connection of the soul. I have sought power and position not because I could help but because...

Since the last time through this dare I have given up anything that could become addictive for me, (like video games). Until I can strike a healthy balance in my marriage, my only priorities in life have been Christ, Marriage, Family, Job. The odd thing...

The first time around I did this in a note. I was afraid to do so in person. This time with God's encouragement and Spirit I will do so in person. I was afraid last time of how she would react, that she would react negatively to this message, I love...

This is now a dare that has become a practice in my life - for the past 21 days I have been reading the bible and praying everyday. It is easy once you make it a practice. The results in my life have been much more peace, much more courage to face each...

What I didn't quite get the first time around the love dare book was that God was reshaping me. God doesn't tempt us, but he does reshape us, provide life experiences that permit us to see, if we have eyes, to hear, if we have ears. Things are...

This is what God is telling me today: My will to love alone has never been enough. It still is not, I fail everyday to love as I should because I fail to reach out to Christ. The hardest part of life is not being in the moment, seeking the divine at every...

I do not know what happened in first 40 days as this dare seems to have been missed. There was no writing in the book and I do not recall doing this dare. That is why I am doing the dare again, there are things I missed the first time, where it seems...

I have always felt that guarding my wife's secrets was an important value in the marriage. Until the affair happened and then I opened up. I felt trapped, exposed, slandered to my friends as I learned that she has been sharing intimate details of...