Hey everyone. Thus far for showing my wife kindness, I prepared her coffee in the morning, packaged her breakfast, and lunch for work. I opened the car door as well as we left for work. In all honesty, these are things that I would normally do, but obviously with the threat looming in the distance of her wanting to separate, my heart is fully invested in everything I am doing. However, I am reminded of yesterday's sermon which really spoke to my heart with regards to how I've really been a Pharisee towards my wife, and not a loving man-at least not consistently.
I called her mother as well, but I didn't include that in the Acts of kindness category. I just wanted her mother to know that I don't look at her as someone who didn't teach my wife the truth (Jhn. 14:6). I told her that I respected her, and loved her, and just wanted to let her know as my wife's mother how much I appreciated her.
Anyway, the day is not over. On Saturday, while she was with her parents, I stopped off at Staples, and developed our wedding photos, which I will be picking up today. I don't know why we never got our photos developed, I guess we were just focused on other things, and plus we have one photo my sister took of us at our wedding that was beautiful and we have that in our bedroom. Regardless, I plan to hang some of them up in our living room in a Pinterest/Hipster kinda way (IDK how else to explain it, haha!).
I am much more hopeful in God really transforming my heart in a profound way through this 40 day journey. We are all being sanctified into Christ's image, but to hear from my wife those words of her wanting to separate for a while truly is crushing. It deflates you. I only want to continue seeking the LORD in a more intimate way with each day that passes while doing the Love Dare.
PS: I will also be meeting w/ a Pastor from our Church tomorrow night @ 6:30PM to receive individual counseling. I am hoping this aids in the transformation of my heart as well. Thank you!
The Love Dare will transform you if you do the dares as intended the best you can. so, if a dare says to talk to her, don't call and surely do not text. It may be a little easier to text or call instead of doing the dares in person, but those dares we find difficult will be the dares that we grow more in Christ's image.
i hesitate to say this. For you act of kindness, organizing the pictures, she may (may not) show a little anger or frustration, because she may think you are throwing the marriage vows in her face.
But in all dares have no expectations of her reactions. She will sometimes show frustration or anger, thinking you should have been this way all the time, not just because you are threatened with a separation. And she may think this is all a ruse in trying to win her back then you will go back to your old ways. Thus, the testimony you are building needs to be consistent. Or she may just ignore your actions in doing the dares.
If your motivation with the pictures was a true act of kindness, that is good. but if it has an ulterior motive such as a reminder that she promised for better or worse, then I suggest a new act of kindness and save the pictures for a later time.
Do not share the LD with her. Keep it as a journey between you and Christ. If she asks what you are up to, simply say somehting like you are trying to grow in Christ's ways and learn more about unconditional love. NOt that we want to hide any truth from her, but if she hears the LD she may think of it as a step by step guide to win her back. And this is not the case.
Thank you, Tim. You may be right about how she'd take the photos being on the wall. I don't want to throw it in her face, but I thought it would be nice to remember. You're right though, it does need to be about consistency for her. HmMm. I may take them down just to be safe.