Here goes. Not sure what I am going to type till the words hit the screen. maybe just a way to sort some of my own thoughts.
I got a request on LinkedIn from her girlfriend. the one that gave her a couple d lawyers' names. And I am sure got her to think about filing. And maybe looking at houses/apartments. She's also been with her and knows how she flirted and talked to and met and spent a lot of time with and received a ton of guys phone numbers. I still do not know how anyone would accept a friend's betrayal to their spouse, yet alone encourage it.
So, before the LD, I had never forgiven anyone in my life. And I was king of holding a grudge. But, and maybe I read this in the book, I do not remember......If love comes from God and not us, and we are sharing His love with others, then I can take God's forgiveness to me and share that with her, and him, and him and.....the others and her girlfriend. And a big weight came of my chest when I shared Christ's forgiveness with all these people.
I know I will not be friends with these people, or desire to spend time with any of them even though I have forgiven them.
But when I received the request from her, I was shocked how instantly my anger popped up, yet alone does she not realize she should be thinking she and I should be mortal enemies by the world's ways? . I thought why on earth would I associate with her, or accept her as a contact. And then I settled down and remembered and confirmed, that I had forgiven her. And accepted her request.
Which lead me to the thought I will see her most likely in a few months at a get together with a bunch of people. I guess I will if I pass by her I'll give her a formal hello. I can't see being friendly or warm to her. That's still forgiveness isn't it? The flesh wants to rip her up and down verbally.
so, I guess I am realizing maybe there is more than mentally forgiving someone. Kind of like after the initial phase of forgiving, there is a phase two. And that is determining how to shine Christ's light to someone you have no desire to ever be near. And maybe should never be near again. Before this, I would have protected this woman willingly like a sister. I still would, but not be so happy about it.
Will not hurling insults or ignoring her all together be enough? Christ forgives everyone, but would he have sat down and played Monopoly with His torturers?
Man, this journey stretches a person further than at least what I desire.
So, I suppose just another thing to pray about.
Don't accept her request. I believe you can forgive someone and be kind. Forgiving doesn't always me you have to love that person or trust them. Just be kind and turn your check and keep quiet. If this is her girlfriend do not plas into their games. Be still, quiet and don't accept the request. The girlfriend is fishing for info most likely. Don't get tangled in their game, leave them guessing. The request could also be an automatic request from Linkin, who knows those sites are so crazy. Be still and trust God to handle it.
You know what I learned Easter weekend? Jesus served Judas the Last Supper. Just let that sink in. You have a heart of gold and the patience of Job, Tim. So glad to see not one but two posts from you! Going to catch up when I have time later!
Hey brother, it is hard when we have to deal with those who seem to be adversaries to our marriage. I know my husband has a lot of people in his life who are anti-marriage. They are always giving him advise and bad advise at that. Maybe God will use you to show her friend your testimony and because the friend has influence over your wife, she may be open to seeing you in a different light. Just a thought. Prayers to you.