Collaborate without boundaries


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All of you, new people and some of you who have been around for a while.  I thank each of you for journalling when you feel called to do so or feel like you need to.  Because so many times, I feel stalled or thinking selfishly, man, this is getting old, I will hang in there, but man, this is getting old not knowing who or where or what she is doing.

And then I read where someone has it way worse, and knows what is happening.  And she stands.  And then a new person comes on board, and you can see tears running down their face and the pain they are enduring.  And he stands.

And I think, but I have been standing for over 4 years.  Isn't there a time frame where it is ok to stop standing?  Do I get to throw a little ultimatum at her?  I know the answers, but it sure helps when I read your words.  

So, continue to be a witness to Christ.  I need it, your neighbor needs it, your spouse needs it, and so many people even on this site that never type a word and you will never know of them will need it.  

Keep standing in Christ.  And remember, it isn't you really that is taking the stand, it is you allowing Christ to stand in you who is standing.  We are all so weak, but Christ is so powerful in us.  Be bold yet humble in Him.  Your spouse, your family, your neighborhood, the world needs you.  

I wasn't going to say anything about what is going on, but since you all share, I thought I should too.  She came home thursday night at 945.  She responds most times when I say something like what is happening at work.  She shruggs or says hmm.  Something little.  she said a few weeks ago she is trying to come home earlier and I think she is.  She sometimes kind of lets me know she is going out with her girlfriend by kind of acting frustrated when she is always running late and her girlfriend supposedly is texting her if she has left yet.   She told me one Saturday morning she made eggs that i could have some.  

No converstations at all, no closeness, but her anger is curbed.  It is like she is holding on to a grudge now or letting pride take control so she won't cave in.  Maybe she has or still has a boyfriend, but if so, it must be not so hot and heavy.  She doesn't hide and text or talk any more.  So, nothing really new, other than she has calmed down a bit more and kind of listens when I talk.  But I do not push it at all.  She gets plenty of space.  I do let her know where I am going and with who.

Lynn is right, you can enjoy your days and find new things about yourself.  Happiness is in Christ, not our spouses.  I have fun just doing mindless things, or cheap things like getting a bite at wendy's on a friday night.  

May Christ's peace be with all of you.




  • You have the patience of Job.  Prayers to you my brother.

  • Wow Tim.  4 years.  Are you still doing the dares.  Your patience and obedience os a true testimate to faith.  I cant tell you how much I appreciate your knowledge and help.  Prayers for you my friend.  

  • Thank you for sharing, Tim.  You are an inspiration.

  • Thank you so much...convicting and encouraging me in these moments.  Peace be with you.

  • My wife no longer lives with me.  The option to live together doesn't exist.  

    Each situation is different.  I think that if I was in yours I would continue to stand.  I don't know where you and she went wrong or why she treats you with indifference.  Up until my wife left, she still showed caring she wasn't cold.  It was when she allowed herself to feel for another guy that she acted cold towards me.  I still remember when she said it destroyed her to act that way.

    I think she hates me.  That whatever motivates her now is a loathing of me.

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