Collaborate without boundaries

Day 9 - God knows my heart... why can't my husband see it...

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Day 9  - 4 mistakes..

Words just can't express the level of sadness and failure I feel right now.

4 different things today spiraled my husband back into the pit of despair.  I have no idea how they all could have been taken so wrong.

I know I have to stay the course and not allow his reactions to dictate my walk with the Lord through this journey which at this moment I feel like I am failing completely.

The dare, unconditional love.  Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse something that proves (to you and him) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. 

The examples were all things I already do, clean the kitchen, do the laundry, by his favorite dessert....

Demonstrate love to them for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage.


I couldn't think of anything.  A complete blank.  Then I thought of the conversation we had about the bed in the office and how it was making him feel pushed to the side, and like an old friend who stayed with us for a few months.  

Then it hit me.  Move his bed back to the living room where he was a part of things again.  I asked him this morning to allow me to correct what I felt was a huge wrong and move his bed back out to the living room.  He said ok.  So, I thought he did.

Tonight, he went into the office and asked where his bed was.  When I told him, he had told me I could move it, he said no he didn't and it was fine he would just sleep back on the floor or chair, it's my house and I can move him where ever I want to. 

I was heartbroken.  Not only did I miss understand him, but he was telling me I failed in the dare to do as he asked with respect to the only thing he brought up about what makes him uncomfortable or frustrated by me. 

His only thing was that I don't listen to him when he tells me not to do things.  I have worked really hard without 100% success but making progress to do this one thing.  Yet I failed miserably to him because the movement of the bed failed on every front.

God knows my heart. He knows I was doing all I did that failed my husband today from selflessness not a selfish act.

This is about me and you Lord, and my husband is the beneficiary of my change of heart, repentance of my sins, and a renewed selfless heart that is being led to love as Christ loves us the man who I have been blessed with to be my husband, my best friend.



  • The last thing you said is the most important thing you said, stay there, you need to find your love and your comfort in Christ. Just do your best with the dares God and does the rest. It is a journey, expect to travel aways and see some blisters.

  • Maybe you didn't hear what  he said......Maybe  he did say it was okay to move his  bed and he's now reacting  this way to show you he didn't cave in a little the day before (when you sensed a change in him/)  

    He has to do these things for a couple reasons.  One, to justify his  behavior.  Two, to prove to you he's not softened.  Three, to get you to react negatively so he can say, see, you havn't changed.  fouir, to show you and  himself he's in control.

    Do not worry if your  husband sees or doesn't see your changes.  He sees more than he will let you know.  

    Be in peace, thee will be many steps going backward while God is moving things forward.  

  • Nothing is ALL your fault. You are imperfect, your husband is imperfect. Together you are still imperfect. Work through it. You made a mistake or misunderstood. It doesn't matter. The past is exactly that. No sense in living there. Learn from this and improve. Be strong.

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