I went over my last dare 6 which I did in September, and alot of the areas I need to add margin to are the same because of my situation. I again need to stop texting and calling my husband so much and stop snooping around to see what he's up to. Every night he seems to be "unavailable" and I always ask what he was doing and he always says his personal life is not my business and I get mad, and even if I did find out what he was doing and I didn't happen to like it, what good is that doing? It's just going to upset me and make me mad and not want to do anymore dares. So I've decided to not ask what he is up to or pry about this or that. I also need to stop being a depressed lump on a log for my son. Since we don't have access to our car because my husband took it, we can only get places by my mother driving us or if we walk. So usually we're stuck in our apartment, while he plays and I sit on the computer the majority of the day. I hate it. I want to try and find different things for us to do together wether it's inside or outside. I need to start living as though my husband isn't coming back, because that may happen. I hate even thinking about it because it makes my heart stop and takes my breath away. I am doing good with money though and not spending alot since I have limited funds now since my husband cut me off from money, doesn't even pay child support right now. I'd like to cook more for my son, I used to LOVE to cook, I'd cook suppers every night for my family but since my husband left I don't cook at all, I usually make him something really easy, but I'd like to get back into cooking for him. I have been looking into going back to school as well, because that's something my husband always had an issue with, him making all the money and I was a stay at home mom, but not only for that but also for incase he doesn't come back, I want to be able to provide for myself and my son and give him a good life. I have an appointment next week about schooling and that's a little exciting because I never planned on going back to school or working, I planned on being a stay at home mom, and even if things do work out with myself and my husband I think I'd still like to go to school and get a good job so we can have a better life. Those are the areas I need to add margin. Especially the leaving my husband alone one, I really need to work on that one and leave him to God to fix.
Jamie,
If I may. One area of margin that should come first. Even before your son. Is margin for Christ. You need to depend on Him, not your husband.
We have a jealous God and anything before Him is something that will put a barrier up in our walk.
When you do that, you then start to realize that anything you do that you really can't control (stop texting and calling my husband so much and stop snooping around to see what he's up to) are just manipulations and doing it on your own.
If we were able to fix these things we would have done it already. But we cant.
As you walk with Christ you learn all the areas of love as God intended. With that you learn to love your son better, your husband better. But without Christ you cant. You continue the selfish mode. For example the situation you just described all falls back to selfish feelings. Hence lacking in margin you described.
Listen to what Christ is telling you through all this, it is obvious you recognize the conviction, now start listening to it and acting on it. Your feelings will catch up with your actions soon enough. Christ will comfort you.