I asked my husband what the 3 things were that irritated him or annoyed him about me. He has yet to respond. He most likely won't because he thinks it will start a fight or confrontation like usual. I called him today because he was supposed to come over and I asked why he wasn't coming and he said he was that the day isn't over, and that he'll "stop by" later. He was supposed to come over not just stop by so I said must have better things to do since you're just stopping by on your way to do them now. He told me he's sick of my attitude, well sorry if I'm not bowing down to you and everything you want. I'm sooo sick of him! He walks all over me and treats me like crap. He expects me to do as he says and give him what he wants, he thinks I should be grateful that he even speaks to me. Well I'm done with it. I'm tired of crying everyday while he's out living the life with random girls and not paying any attention to his family that loves him. I'm so emotionally drained. I feel like giving up. Can I just do the dares and that's it and not speak to him or see him otherwise? I mean I know I will have to see him when he picks up the baby/drops him off but other then that... Will they still work if we're not talking all the time or seeing eachother. I feel so helpless and hopeless. I have very strong faith even when all signs point to things not working out, I still believe they will in time. He's just so frustrating and he's not the man I married right now. He was so loving and caring and now he is so cold and mean. I feel like nothing and I'm so depressed.
Here I am few hours later now sad. I can't handle my yo yo emotions. One minute I'm flaming mad at him and the next I'm crying from sadness. How do I cope? I ask got for strength all the time. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm torn because I feel like if I just do what the dares ask and don't talk to him or see him other then when he picks up/drops off our son, then he'll never come back, I feel as though we need to talk and I need to invite him here to see our son so we can be around eachother, and spend time as a family for him to miss it. But then part of me doesn't want to let him have his cake and eat it too, because he shouldn't be able to run around on me and then still hang out here with myself and our son. Part of me wants to give up because since he's seeing other people, then he won't come back, and part of me just wants to let him go and maybe he'll come back on his own. I really don't know what to do... I'm constantly changing my mind on what to do, whether it be talk to him and get along or have nothing to do with him. I get mad because at night he is out doing whatever he pleases and doesn't talk to me, but will talk during the day, so at night I'm always mad and angry at him because he's out doing god knows with who knows. I just don't know what to do! What is my best solution? To put on a happy face and get along even though I'm dying inside, or just let him go do his thing and leave him alone? I'm scared to leave him be because I'm scared if I do that I don't see how we'll come back together where as if we talk and hang out he might start to miss it... See how torn I am, I just repeated myself how many times.....
Doing the dares and that is it, nothing more nothing less is a GREAT idea. You are still depending on your emotions and your husband. It seems the only time Christ is involved is a side hope...
And I am sorry to say, nothing will change until you depend on Christ and GET OUT OF HIS WAY!
Jamie, you have tried to do it your way. Even today. It gets you no where. STOP. Pray for Gods wisdom and comfort upon you.
Through each of these emotional things Christ is molding you but you are not listening to Him.
You need to put God first, Love Him first, you will learn to love everyone better. Depend on Christ each moment of your day. And when you do the dares... Do them as Christ intended, no matter what you think the response will be. That is the success of these dares, trusting Christ to do them His way.
And that is it.... AS you depend more on Christ, and not being around your husband or calling him, watch what happens. Your husband will start calling you. Even if it is just to start an argument to get attention.