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Re: Day 32 - Liked it so much I did it twice!

Day 32 - Liked it so much I did it twice!

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  • Just to clear the air, no intimacy occurred between my wife and I but I think this is worth sharing with you all. This week has been very stressful in that both my wife and eldest son had their birthdays. Yesterday was my son’s birthday and you can imagine how difficult it was for me to wake in our home not their for the first time in 7 years. I did see them later in the evening and although difficult I got through the day. After my kids karate class the boy’s got into my wife’s car and then the birthday boy opened his gift from me. He enjoyed it and we talked a little. As much as I enjoyed that, this dare was on my mind the whole time as I knew I would not see my wife today on Day 32. So as we are walking around the car, I go for it and spring it on her with a smile on my face (she didn’t see my facial expression). She heard me but asked me to repeat myself because she wasn’t sure she just heard what she did. The when I said it the second time she smiled and giggled! I wasn’t sure what to expect out of her since we are currently separated and not working on reconciliation just yet (we’re working on ourselves – and by-golly I am doing much better than she in my opinion… but that is not what this is about… Love is Patient. At that moment a huge relief came over me – God is in control and working on our marriage! Ah, so you thought that was the end? Actually the second time I sprung the question was today! I told my Dad what I had done, and he got a kick out of it – he doesn’t understand The Love Dare but could benefit from it with his second marriage. Anyhow… My eldest had to have some dental work done and I asked they call me to let me know how it went. After talking to my son for a few minutes he turned the pone over to my wife. Poor guy was slurring his words and all.. It was cute. So there I was on the phone with my wife and I was asking here about plans and if they might be interested in doing something with me tomorrow. She said she would have, had I given her enough time to plan for it! Right there the opportunity struck… I said, “So, you need advance notice to plan things”? She responded Yes and I pulled the trigger…. “So do you want to plan to make love”? That led to further conversation and I let her know that I have changed and that I have much more change to go through. I didn’t let her know what was going on with me (The Love Dare) but I think things are setting in – I am doing my work, and God is working on us! Her attitude is softening and we are healing as individuals… and I am walking closer and closer to Christ each day that passes!
  • Blessings will always come when you trust Christ.... And that dare is one that takes Christs molding for you not to look for excuses...

    But remember this. Because you think her heart is softening, does not mean for you to take control back from Christ. Because it will fall apart if you do.

  • Thank you, Sean - I agree.  I can never take back control.  I have had the revelation that Pride has corrupted me all my life and is largely responsible for what has happened to my marriage.  It has never been about me not being sincere, but rather what Pride takes away from a relationship.  Since I have surrendered to Christ, I have a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.  I know I can not 'Fix-it' as it is not mine to do so.  Marriage is a gift from God - and loosing sight of that has held me back for all these years. 

    Walking with Christ is real - things happen because it is his will.  I'm only now able to see her 'softening heart' because I have allowed the holy trinity into my life.

    I keep coming back to two phrases - Love is Patient and from Dave Ramsey - Baby Steps.  I have a long way to go - and will always have room for improvement.

  • God has wired us all with a sense of pride that the world and the flesh has corrupted. And we need to realize that we are not God and cannot control things.

    With that said, allow this journey of the dare to let Christ mold you more in His image. This way you become the testimony she needs in her life with you.

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