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Re: Round 2 - Day 72

Round 2 - Day 72

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  • Unfortunately, this dare was not able to be completed. My husband did not come home after work today. He texted me around 9 when he got off to let me know what he was going to a bar to watch the college bball games. Since we just moved we don’t have cable yet. He didn’t come home after that though. I’m used to it. I don’t ask questions. Never have. Once again, this is the, I would rather not know. I’m not going to search for answers to these questions nor am I going to ask him. I don’t need to trust my husband; I just need to trust God. I don’t really understand why I feel this way, I just do. I would really like to complete this dare though. Next time we are both at home I will. The first round it was a successful dare. We ended up having sex three times after the dare, but I decided to stop perusing him since he told me that he still felt the same way and wanted a divorce. I just decided that during the second round I was only going to complete my dare each day and nothing else.

    I understand the meaning more now. God delights in us having sex as long as it is for the right reasons. I want to have sex with my husband so I can fulfill his needs and our hearts can join together. I read some of the Songs of Soloman last night so I could better understand the love that I should be expressing to my husband. God has bound us together as “one flesh” so I want to keep that fresh on my mind.

  • Remember.... As your dares continue. Just because things do not change in him does not mean you stop.

    You are loving him unconditionally. With no expectations. So continue to love him the way God intended. Leave the rest up to God to deal with. When you do that, conviction will come to him.

  • There is not a doubt in my mind that I am going to stop. I am going to continue to love my huband unconditionally and fight for this marriage until God tells me to stop. Which I am sure that will never happen. I do not care how hard it is, I don't care how much I am rejected. I never expect anything out of my husband when I complete dares. I truly believe that all of this is happening for a reason and even if I don't undestand, I still chose to praise God and thank him for everything He is doing in my life and marriage. At one point in this journey I said, " I know that God is in control of my life, I am ready to move on with Him, and if my husband wants a divorce I wish he would just hurry up and get started with the process so I can move on." I know now how selfish that was and I just need to trust in God's timing. I am at a different state now though. It is hard for me. I need my husband, I'm incomplete without him, God designed him for me, so I am desiring this so much right now. Maybe I just need to let it happen and accpet the fact that I am supposed to feel this way towards my husband because God wants me to.  

  • God does not want you to feel that way... God wants you to be dependent upon Him. Not your husband.

    God wants to fill every void in your heart, your mind, your life.

    I to felt the way you did. But there came a point when God was first, PERIOD. That is when I realized that I could not be dependent on her. In our marriage we did not have oneness...

    That hurt in your heart for your husband, is the same hurt Christ has for you right now.

    Lead your heart completely back to Christ and not only will you be comforted by Christ, but you will be able to love your husband better.

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