Collaborate without boundaries

Day 31

Day 31

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  • I am on day 31 but this my first post. I have really just been referring to others post to help me on dares I'm not 100% how to do, but I dont feel like I'm getting anywhere no matter what I do and thought it was time for a better support group that is unbiased. I will say my wife and 2 kids(10&7) have been staying with her parents for about 2 weeks now, but this situation has been about a month when she finally sent me a message of how she felt unhappy and then threw walls up and has been so cold and hard since. I work a lot and work a crazy schedule but we were always doin things so I worked to make sure we could and didnt realize the impact i was having. She has more than likely been feeling that for a while but it kind of surprised me when she sent the message of how unhappy she was because we were always doin so much with others, seemed to be havin fun, but I was foolish to miss it. She filed for divorce about 10 days ago because I said I wouldn't move out and abandon them, so she left and threatened to file because I wouldn't leave. I have over the past month been working on my relationship with God heavily because I backslid, both of us did, but now I'm back and seeking him like I havent ever before.

    I did today's dare and sent her a message and she wrote back she wished I wouldn't text or call unless it's about the kids and I told her I would respect and honor that for her because of the pain I know I brought to her.. I havent wanted to contact her so I could give her space but the past few dares have said to so I felt like I needed to do them whether it was annoying her or not but I guess today she got tired of it because it was like 3 out of 4 days of them. I know God is working even when I cant see and that it's not his will for us to be divorced because He hates divorce but I have been battling just missing her and the kids at home and the past few nights the devil has been battling me in my dreams where I have dreamed of her talkin about spending time with someone else and I wake up feeling horrible until I pray and get into some scripture. Just looking for some extra prayer and wisdom.

  • Welcome.  try posting in a different section of the site. Click the community tab, and then click The Love Dare Journal section.  that part is much more active.  If you have trouble posting there, come back here and I will try to help.

    You may already know or  read this.....This will be a journey, between you and Christ, not you and  her.  She is being used as a tool to mold you.  Do a dare a day, no more, no less.  do not  read ahead  in the book, other than the appendix, especially about leading the heart.  Do not have expectations of  her when you do the  dares.  Do not change the dares to make them easier.

    As far as  not contacting her unless it's because of the kids, per her request, I would consider still doing the dares, but seek wisdom in prayer in what to do.  Remember, a lot of dares as you have noticed, require no contacting, so with those days, along with you not calling or texting for other reasons that aren't required, may be just enough to give her the space she needs.

    Love believes the best, that she's not seeing anyone. let the thoughts of the dreams go..   keep going to Christ in prayer and scripture when this happens.

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