In retrospect, there were many things that we were divided over, we just never spoke of them. I've prayed about those divisions along this journey but the one I will focus on for the rest of the day is how I would not let her contribute much financially to the household. I thought I was helping her due to loser her well-paying job and being forced to take a very low paying job, but I wasn't listening to her. She didn't want me to support her... she wanted me to help her be independent. I will pray more about this tonight. I won't have any face to face oppotunities to meet her, but I may send an email. I''m not sure yet.
But in marriage there is no independence. There should only be oneness.
I agree, but that oneness cannot always be acheived overnight (not without Christ moving in the marriage). She needed to feel independent due to her material losses and I should have been more responsive to that praying that we would become one as Christ intended us to be.
You are right. It cannot happen overnight. But it is those situations that have led you to invite Christ into your life that now you can be that testimony and now have a chance at the true oneness.