A little bit about myself, I was told a year ago by my husband of 10 years that he is not happily married anymore. A very hard blow to the heart for sure. Since then we've been through two different counseling sessions which were not by any professional marriage counselor. I thought that things were getting a little better at least but he didn't think so. We sold our house in October and still lived/slept together until the day we had to be out of our house November 19. When we had to be out he told me he didn't want to buy together. I now live by myself and he's living with his parents. The hardest thing is that he's still been able to have sex with me. His actions don't meet his words and he hasn't filed. This past weekend he asked me how much longer we keep doing this and I told him that I'm not giving up and that bothers him. I've never been on my own and to be paying for everything by myself is so hard with no help. We have two beautiful children 6 and 3. The 6 year old doesn't like the situation at all.
I didn't grow up in the church so my faith is a little shakey although I feel like since this has all happened I've become closer with God although have a long way to go. I feel like he's punishing me by taking the most important person to me away. I don't believe this is what God wants but my husband does. and that he only married us to have children. His reasons are that he's fallen out of love for me and we've drifted apart. I just don't find this justification for a divorce. He is not the man of faith that he was when I met and married him. This breaks my heart that his heart is so hardened and I pray every day multiple times a day that God will change his heart.
He wont do anymore counseling, seminars, etc. I've been told about the Love Dare and so I'm attempting it alone. I'm on day 3 and with only seeing him a few times a week it's very hard. Any advice or anything would be great. I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle and with my faith not where it should be and I know that I'm not perfect and we all have room to grow I just feel like my heart is telling me to keep fighting.
Sorry I did not see this sooner and respond. But I see that you are posting in the journal section.