Collaborate without boundaries

Re: Day 23

Day 23

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  • Melanie seemed happy with the time I spent with her and the kids and never complained about my drinking, but I felt it was a problem.  I quit drinking, but it was after we separated.  Not much I can do about this now but continue my walk with Christ.

    I have also made a point not to discuss too much about the marriage with anyone.  The people that are close to me automatically want to take my side and I will only tell them that there are no sides to take, that it was a mutual decision.  And I always defend her if someone speaks negatively of her.

    I have to be honest, I no longer care whether she comes back or not.   I sincerely asked God to show me what it was like to completely trust in Him and not worry about the marriage or anything else, and He granted it.   I still care about her and pray for her to walk with Christ, but I no longer I ask for our marriage to be restored, just that God's will is done.  If His will puts us back together, I know it will glorify Him.

    Not quitting the dares though.  They're an awesome gift from God. 

  • Be careful. It may not be that you do not care if you want her to come back or not. It may be that you are blessed with Christ filling every void you have.

    You should care. You are still married. And that covenant was put together by Christ and as it says in the Bible, Let no man put asunder. That includes you!

    But where you are awesome is praying for Gods will.... That is where you need to be.

    I said be careful, because satan can and will try to take advantage of the situation. And maybe it is by confusion. Remember God is not the author of confusion.

    When you live and accept Gods will in your life, things do not feel like problems like they used to. We are blessed to be able to set them at His feet and just let Him deal with the problems, but that does not mean we forget about them! We still have to be the testimony of the outcome!

  • I reread this after reading your post and I didn't come out exactly as I had meant.  It seemed negative towards her and that is not what I had intended.  Yes, I still care and miss her and I still would prefer us to get back together but at this point it would to glorify Christ more so than fulfilling my personal desires.... or maybe that my desires are beginning to become what God desires for me.   I still find it hard to describe how I feel about without sounding like I don't care, but I can best sum it up like this...  If she comes back, I know I will be ok.... if she's doesn't come back, I still know I will be ok .   I have a purpose to fulfill in Christ at His appointed time He will take care of everything else as long as I seek Him first.

  • So then as I said. He has filled your voids. Now you will see what true happiness is. Something we all have been seeking our whole lives and what we had just wasnt enough... LOL.

    Now, here is the best part. The next time you are able to truly share love with someone, be it her or not, it will be something you never dreamed possible.

  • This journey has had a profound impact on all of my relationships.  Bad relationships have been restored, good relationships have become even better and I've made a ton of new friends.  A few years ago, I would bolt out the doors of church without speaking to anyone.  Now it may take me 30 minutes or more to leave.

  • Praise God.... Now you can see what true happiness really is.

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