This was a difficult challenge for me because the idea that I had involved having money. Yesterday, my hubby had his mood swings which is one of my biggest challenges. I called and asked him if there was anything he needed money for because I was thinking of using what I had left and he said no. He asked me what I needed to buy coz he knows that I very seldom say anything about needing money. I hardly spend even my own paycheck. So, I told him that I needed to buy some personal hygiene stuff. When i found out that I couldn't afford what I wanted to get for him, I was so disappointed. Then he asked me again, what I needed to buy...so finally, I said I was gonna come clean and told him that I wanted to get him a bottle of brandy to go with his cigar when he watches the game that night. He asked me why and I told him, no special reason..I just wanted to do something nice for him. He laughed and put his hand on my head while I was driving and said, 'no baby you don't have to do that. I appreciate the thought but, you don't have to." He smiled and dropped to one of his happy moods. Everything was perfect until we got to the gym and he said he was going to meet me at the reception area after he puts his things in the locker room. I have been waiting a long time and he still hasn't come out. Then I remembered that there was a landline phone in the locker room. Then, the thought that he is probably on the phone calling his mistress shattered my mood. I couldn't get my mood back up again but I still tried. While I was making dinner, he kept asking me what was wrong coz he said my mood was not like how it was when we first saw each other that afternoon. I didn't want to say anything anymore to avoid an argument. He asked me how I felt...he asked me if I had any doubts or fears that day and I honestly said Yes, and that I think that was normal. He told me whenever I felt that way, I should pick up the phone and call him to talk. I said, I don't want to even entertain that thought because that is when we start arguing. I said, I have to learn to fight that feeling in me. I know that he is still finding ways to do the things that hurt our relationship but, my faith in God tells me to be patient. I know he will not change overnight, but I see positive responses to my dares. So, in God's time I know my prayers will be heard and we will be ok.
You need to focus on Christ in those moments. Your flesh is going to think the worst and honestly you are just causing yourself grief. Christ wants you to depend on Him to fill the voids especially in times of concern.
In your mind you will end up hearing BE STILL FOR I AM GOD> Leave it with Christ.