55—Love is still Honorable
“Choose a way to show honor and
respect to your spouse that is above your normal routine. It may be
holding the door for her. It might be putting his clothes away for
him. It may be the way you listen and speak in your communication.
Show your mate that he or she is highly esteemed in your eyes.”
have been working towards honoring my husband since the start of my journey—in my
communication with him and communication to others about him. Some days are
more challenging than others, but I am reminded that “love honors even when it’s
rejected. Love treats its beloved as special and sacred even when an ungrateful
attitude is all you get in return.”
is a short entry tonight since I did not have any contact with him today.
However, I did have a great conversation with my Mom about him, which has not
taken place in a long time. I know she comes from a place of love and
protection for me as her daughter, so this has all been very difficult for her
to accept, but she is getting there and I thank God everyday for that.
It is your testimony that will give her the understanding of Christ working in your life. And she need not worry as most would.
My support network doesn't support me on this journey. They want to protect me giving me advice to lawyer-up to protect my interests, but I am not listening to them...I have my own path to follow and I am really needing the closeness I have with God. I hadn't realized how distant my relationship with Him had become.
I made breakfast for my husband when he came home briefly this morning, which was refused. I folded his papers and had them ready for him, he told me it wasn't necessary to help him in that way.
He races bikes so I plan on displaying an award he got in our living room to show honor. I have been doing things since the beginning of this journey to show him honor and respect. The more I do, the more I realize how little I showed him respect and honor before he left, I thought I had my reasons for withholding them from him, but now I see how wrong I was. No matter how he treated me and how he neglected me, I had no right to refuse him love. Because of where I am at now, I can see my mistakes and grow and learn from them. I am close to God again and I am in a place where I can freely give love and respect and honor to everyone I meet, even if it is rejected and thrown back in my face. Easter messages and Bible readings were really helpful and more meaningful to me this past weekend than they have been in the past. Suddenly, I see how God suffers when we turn away from Him, but He still love us. When I started this journey it was out of desperation and dispair. I will conclude it with a stronger faith and I will be in a better place and I will no longer take my relationships for granted, not with people or with God. In time, when we are talking I will have to ask for forgiveness from my husband for the ways I have failed him.
It is hard for people to understand what you are doing. And praise God you have the strength to focus on Christ and not their opinions.
Very important thing in this journey. Do what the dares say to do, dont do more, dont do less. Take each dare each day and focus on how Christ is molding you through that dare... and when the response comes, also take that to Christ, be it good or negative responses, and compare that to your life of the past with Christ.