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Day 12 and Spouse Wants Divorce

Day 12 and Spouse Wants Divorce

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  • I am attempting the Love Dare to help save my marriage. I'm trusting in God and I'm asking for help with my current situation.

    My wife and I are separated due to something cruel, horrible and devastating that I said during an argument. We are expecting our first child and my wife wants an easy divorce so she can move on without being tied to me.

    Today's dare says to give in to let her win. In this case my giving in would be to agreeing to dividing or debts, money, and making child arrangements and attaching this agreement with her divorce papers.

    I am searching desperately for answers.

  • welcome Marc. I posted here earlier but somehow the message got erased.  For some reason I came back to check.  Glad i did.

    This will be a journey betwen you and Christ not you and her.  She will be used as a tool to mold you to love Christ's way.

    We all came to this site to save our marriage, but if we do this right, doing a dare a day, the way they are intended to be done, such as talking face to face if called to vs texting or on a call, and doing no more or no less than a dare a day, we will grow in a journey with Christ.  And we will build a testimony our spouses need to see.  

    It will get worse before it gets better.  But that is ok.  Have no expectations in doing the dares.  remember what you have learned, biting your tongue and being kind, along with other things.

    Let her win another disagreement.  Do not do anything to aid in a divorce happening.  Such as agreeing to do things that make it easier for her to proceed.  Don't offer to do these things for her.

    Pray on how to accomplish the dares.  

    Do not read ahead, other than the appendix, especially leading the heart.

    Just take this moment by moment if need be.  

  • Thanks again Tim!! Its rough but I'm going to push forward

  • It can be extremely hard to hang in there in the beginning.   What made it easier for me was envisioning Christ standing next to my wife.  And I had to pick one of them for a team mate.  Once I chose Christ over her I felt peace and comfort.  

    When you put Christ way above your wife.   Not loving your wife less but reaaly putting Christ as your number one.  That's when it becomes easier.   Even joyful.  

    Don't worry about not knowing where she is.  Leave it to Christ.   She is desiring space from you.  Doing just a dare a day will help give her that space.   Otherwise you may end up wanting to contact her all the time.

  • Remember that God does not want us to aid another person's bad behavior. I struggled with this dare as well, as my husband demands some wrong things from me. I prayed about it, and something was brought to mind about how I said something in a way that botherd my husband. I chose acnowedging that I should not have said what I said amd promising to try not to say that again as my dare for the day.  

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