Collaborate without boundaries

Re: R1D12

R1D12

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  • Today was mother's day. When the kids woke me up this morning I decided to give them a bath and fed them breakfast. Got myself ready and the girls ready. Since we were up early enough I decided to pack the kids up and we went to church. Our ministers were away at the ELCA Synod meeting in a neighboring town so a few members of the congregation performed the service. I was really getting into the sermon when the kids starting acting up. But what I did get out of it really applied to what I am going through right now. I am hopeful that God will continue to guide me in his ways and forgive all my selfish thoughts and actions. After Church I decided I would treat the girls by taking them out to lunch and treat myself since I have never ever gotten anything from my spouse for mothers day. Not a card, not a breakfast in bed, not a dinner out of the house, and not even the words happy mothers day. Not long after we got home and I put the kids down for a nap. DK called and wished me a happy mothers day. Blew me a way. I thanked him and we visited for a bit. I starting crying when we wished me a happy mothers day. I have wanted that for so many years and never received it. My heart continues to hurt that he isn't here. I don't care at this point if he doesn't want to try to work things out. I just wish he was here so I had someone I could show love to. Someone that I could cherish, someone I could hug and kiss that isn't under the age of 5. I love him so much and I drove him away with my lack of interest in him. If I would have put as much effort into him as I did with work and the kids we wouldn't be in this situation. I know how much God hates divorce. I grew up in a multi faith home. As did my husband. His dad is catholic and his mother is Lutheran. Which is the same as my folks. I can just feel our catholic grandparents spirits upset with us.  

    I was originally going to have him watch the kids this evening for a bit while I went to look at a house. We were at my parents having Ice cream treats to celebrate mothers day with my sister and my mom. I text him and asked if he still wanted me to bring them or if it was okay if they just hung out at my folks. He said it would be fine if they were content. They were happy so I just left them with my folks while I went to look at a potential new home. I did swing by later this evening to drop off the papers I forgot to give him yesterday. It was cold so he didn't stay long. He visited with the girls a bit and told me how he went fishing this evening again and how he didn't catch anything.  I will continue to pray for guidance and strength.

  • Keep trusting Christ, He will take care of you.  Happy mothers day!

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