My wife told me she loves me but is not in love with me. She says she hasn't been for a long time. It crushed me. So I starting reading books and started the Love Dare. The further I get in the dares, the further she gets from me. She started out saying I had the next 10 years (till our youngest graduates). Then it was 2 years as I began doing dares and now my daughter says she was looking at houses yesterday. We used to share a Facebook account but she locked me out of it and my son (one of her Facebook friends) says she added a new friend. A man I accused her of cheating with but she has denied for years. She took over the cell phone management because she says she doesn't want me stalking her about who she calls and who she texts. How do you stalk you wife? I wish I would have started the Love dare sooner but the more dares I complete, the more she accelerates her timeline to leave. What hurts the most is she's doing this with a smile. No anger, no emotion, no remorse. Where did this deceit come from?
I've read many posts from many people and I'm starting to get concerned about the fact that we don't fight. She's totally comfortable with the way things are. She works nights and weekends so leaving or having me leave would mean I'd get the kids. I asked her (before she started reconnecting with her ex on Facebook) if she could at least give me the courtesy of letting me know before she pursues a relationship with someone else. She said she couldn't promise that. I fear she stays because she can't leave with out the kids. She enjoys the dares I do while pursing an open marriage (I can't prove that). If it is God's will that I endure the above and she is just a tool, must he use a tool so sharp?
Few things. First, if you have not seen fireproof, get it and watch it. If at all possible watch it alone. No interruptions. This will show you many things about the dare and journey you are on.
Second, this is a journey between you and Christ, not you and your wife. She is a tool Christ will use in this journey.
When you have fear or concerns about someone else, especially an ex, take it and commit to Christ that problem. Seek His comfort.
Finally read the appendix. Especially the part about leading the heart. Not only think about you and your past when you read that section but also realize where your wife is right now.
And when it comes to the dares. TRUST Christ. Do them as they are intended. Do not manipulate them in anyway no matter what you think her reactions will be...
Thank You Sean. I needed that.
My pleasure