For my dare I gave the dogs a bath and cleaned out the ginney pig cage. I never did those things before my wife always did, but in the morning she mention how she is going to need to give the dogs a bath. In the past I would usually do this and then mention to her that I did it looking for some kind of gratitude. But I did not say anything, but she ask why the dogs look a little wet and my daughter ended up telling her.
Anyways we have talked a little and this whole ordeal has been tough on my girls. She is trying to push me out of the house saying that with me here it is not good, that I am not thinking of my daughters. She told me she does have a lawyer, and really does not show any sign of hope for our marriage. I explained to her how everyone is saying I need to get a lawyer, and really been saying that your marriage is over. She tells me that I do not think you need to get a lawyer, and ask who is telling me that i should give up and it is over. I told her who and she did not comment. She keeps telling me stop concentrating on us, that it seems to her thats what I am doing and not focusing on me. With all of this i feel she is not being honest to me, I feel this other guy is still in the picture.I do not want to give up on us and i believe there is hope yet, I understand that i need to turn her over to God ,let him deal with her his way and I need to focus on me and bring God into my life.
This next dare that I read this morning is a difficult one, just do not know waht to do, I have been doing all the laundry, dishes work around the house, I have asked her if she needs a massage or foot massage, and she says no. I try to listen to her on what she need to get done. The one big thing she keeps saying she needs is space and needs me out of the house in order for that to happen, but everyone says do not leave that house. So really am uncertain what to do at this time.
First. Focus on the Lord not her. Asking all those things that are outside the dare are you trying to control and manipulate the situation. You need to give up manipulation and control and focus on your walk with Christ.
I know it is hard. Because your feelings. But when you start to change your way of doing things and thinking to please the Lord your feelings will catch up. Read the appendix. Right now you are following your heart. And that will do nothing but deceive you. Learn to lead it.
Prayer is so important during this time. Find margin to do it. In fact when you feel the urge to do or say something to her, go pray... Start putting the Lord before her and you.