Hi, all today I began the love dare challenge. My husband and I have been married for almost 8 years and have three young children. We have had some bad fights but we were always able to move past them. In early December we had a fight and he said he was not in love with me. He stopped talking to me and began sleeping in the guest room. He became very cold and said things to hurt me daily. In January he moved packed his things and opened his own bank account. He moved back in Late february and things seemed to get better for only a few days. He has a wall up and says that things will take time and I need to be patient. Thanks to some God loving friends, a church has offered to cover the six session of Christian marriage counseling. We went to our first session and when the counselor asked him to say something he appreciated about me he said that I was a good mother. When the counselor pushed for something more personal he said he had nothing to say at the time. He also said he was skeptical about the whole things. I am afraid that he will never love me the same way. I am praying that through these dares I am transformed to stop fearing the worst and trust that God will give me peace no matter what the outcome.
Welcome. If you can, try posting under the community tab next time, under that tab, there is a link for the love dare journals. No one really comes to this part of the site. But I will try to remember to look over at this part of the site for you.
This will be a journey between you and Christ, not you and your husband. He will be used as a tool to mold you. do a dare a day, no more, no less. This will give him the space he needs. Doing more will get in his space and push him back. Do not manipulate the dares to make them easier. do not read ahead in the book other than the appendix, e3specially about leading the heart. Do not share you are doing the LD, he will think it is a step by step way to win him back.
You will change for the better doing the dares and he will see that but will need time to prove this is really the new you. Have no expectations of him even acknowledging anything when you do the dares. In fact, it will get worse before it gets better. But there is purpose in that. Post often for accountability.
I clicked on the love dare journals tab but i do not see where I can post?
Try clicking your name in the upper right hand corner after you sign in. Then a brighter red tab saying new journal should show up part way down below your name. Click on that. Then I think you click on new journal entry or something like that. Let me know if that doesn't work.