Day 1 Forum: Love is Patient - Recent Threads

Day 1

pupsandpudges12 — Mon, 27 May 2013 21:38:28 GMT

I was given the Fireproof movie about 5 months ago. While I thought several times about watching it, never did, either because I wanted to watch it with my husband on a particular day and he had no interest, or because of me not thinking I needed to watch it while our relationship was going okay. Our relationship is more than complicated. We got married about four years ago, got divorced a year and a half later, went 9 months without speaking, and then reunited and remarried. Now we are finding our marriage in a dangerous place again. After everyone in the house was asleep last night, I decided to watch the video alone. It was extremely good. It spoke to my heart. I have decided to do the 40 day Love Dare, and finish it. So today was Day 1. Very discouraging already. We are not speaking much, but when he asked if we could talk, I tried so hard to maintain patience and not say anything negative. But after awhile his speech became very hostile and I lost my patience. I didn't call him names or anything, but I did not speak lovingly either, and it made him only more angry. Major fail. I am wondering if I should repeat Day 1 again or keep going? I'm frustrated and discouraged, and I just got started. It seems like there is a long and treacherous road ahead to get through these 40 days. But if many others have done it while their marriages were in terrible condition I think I can do it too.

STARTING THE DARE

love4mywife — Mon, 20 May 2013 15:45:14 GMT

LAST NIGHT WHILE GETTING READY FOR BED I SAW THAT FIREPROOF WAS COMING ON AT 10:30 PM. IT HAD BEEN A LONG DAY FOR MY WIFE AND I BOTH OF US WERE DRAIN PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY. EARLIER THAT DAY ON OUR WAY BACK TO TOWN MY WIFE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE IN OUR BEST INTEREST IF WE GET A DIVORCE. THERE ARE TRUST ISSUES WHICH I HAVE CAUSED AND TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY FOR. DRAIN AND TRIED OF THE BACK OF FORTH AND HAVING THE SAME CONVERSATION OVER AND OVER I WAS LIKE OK COOL SHE WANT OUT I WANT OUT TOO! HEY GETTING DIVORCE CROSSED MY MIND NUMEROUS OF TIMES. NEVERTHELESS, I KNEW IN MY HEART THAT I DONT WANT TO LEAVE MY WIFE.

I KNEW IT WAS MEANT FOR ME TO FIGHT FOR MY WIFE BECAUSE IT WAS NO COINCIDENCE THAT THIS MOVIE WAS ON AT THE POINT WHEN I NEED TO WATCH IT THE MOST. I HEARD OF THE MOVIE FIREPROOF BUT NEVER KNEW WHAT IT WAS ABOUT. I WAS DOG TIRED AND THE MOVIE DIDNT COME ON UNTIL 1030 PM! I KNEW I COULD HAVE RENTED IT TODAY OR FOUND IT ON LINE ETC, BUT SOMETHING IN MY HEART TOLD ME THAT IF I LOVE MY WIFE I WOULD STAY UP AND WATCH IT. THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I DID BUT I DIDNT DO IT ALONE MY WIFE STAYED UP WITH ME AND WATCHED IT TO. I AM A VERY MACHO MAN AND NOT THAT EMOTIONAL WHEN IT COMES TO MOVIE ETC, BUT I COULD NOT STOP THE TEARS FROM FORMING IN THE WEB OF MY EYES AS I WATCHED THIS MOVIE. I FELT THAT THIS MOVIE WAS MADE FOR PERSONALLY . I HAVE TAKEN A PLEDGE TO GOD MYSELF AND MY WIFE UNBEKNOWNST TO HER THAT I WILL DO THIS DARE. IT SO FULL FILLING TO KNOW THERE ARE OTHERS OUT HERE FIGHTING FOR THERE MARRIAGE.

Day 1

drkacy2b — Fri, 17 May 2013 01:04:13 GMT

Yesterday, I rewatched the movie "Fireproof." I have been struggling with finding a way to change the heart of the man that I love, and I have realized that I'm not the one who can change it. Only God can do that. I bought the book last night, and have read the introduction, day 1 and the first appendix on leading your heart. I am ready to embark on the day 1 dare.

This dare should be fairly easy, as Jeff and I do not live together. While in the past, my patience level has not been the greatest, I have realized that is usually when I'm not walking with the Lord. I am at my most patient when I'm resting in his word. I love Jeff with all my heart, and know that despite everything we have been through the past 17 years, we were always meant to be together. I have nothing left to lose - either Jeff's heart will change, or mine will. Either way, I want to learn to love as the Lord loves me, and that's what this journey is really about.

Today was day 1 for me - everything went well so far. Of course, when you're not living with someone, it's a lot easier to be patient with someone when you're not occupying space together 24/7. Last night before I went to bed, I sent him a text message saying good night and wishing him a good day the next day. This afternoon, we spoke regarding our son, and chatted for a while about a lot of silly stuff. He is going out of town for a training next week, so I asked him if there was anything that our son and I could take care of while he's out of town. We are taking care of his dog while he's gone, so that's something.

I'm going to read and pray about day 2 tonight. Not sure what this will look like yet, but I am leaving it into the hands of the Lord.

Kim

Husband says he no longer loves me should I just let go?

Gabrielalove — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 20:09:04 GMT

I'm starting this love dare to help my marriage my husband recently came to me saying that he wants to be free and be with other woman I'm completely hurt I have no idea how to handle this?! Day 1 was not hard at all lets see how the rest of the dares go

He doesn't want to be romantically involved with me......

cindygo13 — Sat, 13 Apr 2013 20:25:28 GMT

Hello everyone,

My husband of 6 years says he is through with me and doesn't want a romantic relationship with me anymore. He says he's felt like this for the past 4 years and he says he was never in love with me when we got married (says he doesn't think he was EVER in love with me) and only did it because he thought it was the right thing (i was pregnant). We have two boys (4 and 5), and he's living with his mom right now until he can get his own place. I'm pretty sure he's talking and going out with other women, and as much as I try not to be I am burning with jealousy when I think about it.

So I'm trying to go on this journey to show him selfless love and praying that his heart warms towards me again. I know things are also bad because even though I've been a christian my whole life, my relationship with God was definitely not my priority for the last couple of years.

I started the journey at the beginning of April, and have been trying to do what I can with him living out of the house. He basically tells me whatever I'm trying to do he doesn't want it. He doesn't want my attention, and he's telling me he doesn't want to discuss our relationship because in his eyes he has nothing to give, and doesn't feel that way any more. I am praying to God to ask for guidance and patience. I feel like a fool every time he rejects or ignores my gestures.

So in any of your experiences,do you find it better when you back off and let him try to communicate with you first? Should I give the dares and book a break until he brings up the relationship? I feel like everything I am doing annoys him, and if anything I am pushing him away be seeming desperate and clingy. I am trying to continue with the book, reading a chapter a day, but some of the dares I don't/can't attempt because I know he doesn't want that from me right now. I would appreciate any experiences you have to share with me.

Thanks!!

He's moved out and found love with someone else

stillloveyou — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 09:51:23 GMT

Hi there, we've been married for 16 years and have two beautiful children aged 11 and 8.

Last July my husband told me he couldn't continue our marriage anymore and wanted a divorce. It all came to a big shock to me as I did not see this coming. We've had our troubles in the past but I never thought it would get to this point. He is a very religious man with strong beliefs and I think that may have been my 'security blanket'. I didn't think that he was ever going to do this to me and our family.

As the years have gone by we grew apart. I started not looking after myself and really focused on the kids. I've always worked, and looked after the finances of the house as well as looking after the kids. Yes, he did help with house chores and with the kids but was never interested in being the head of the family. I felt that was his job... so I was always expecting something from him. Since I was doing a lot of the work, I felt that he was responsible for looking after our connection to God and our relationship. I felt that he had to work to get what he wanted.

He has never actually told me but I think that on the very next day he gave me the news he already started seen other women.

It's been 9 months since he's given me the news and little over 4 months since we moved houses. He is now in a relationship which he claims to be a serious one. She is from our home country, met over the internet and has decided to bring her into his house, saying it's for 2 months. The kids go over there 3 nights a week and have to live with them. My husband doesn't know this person for very long (at least that's what he says) and has brought her into our lives. She is also 19 years younger than him and 14 years younger than me.

I thought that by now, I would be in a much better position than I was 9 months ago but I am not. I have been hurt by my husband's actions, attitudes and hateful words. But I still believe in our love, as God blessed our marriage 16 years ago. I pray to God to give me strength everyday but somedays have been harder than others. i pray that his heart is touched again by God so that he can see what we have done to our marriage.

I'd like to take the dare but I am not sure how I can do this living in two different houses, and him having someone else with him. I am very hurt and the kids are also not happy about their dad having someone else.

I have watched the movie twice but I am not sure how I can pull this through.

I am afraid that if I start I won't be able to accomplish every dare and that will put it all in jeopardy. The divorce papers are due in July this year.

Day 1 - Why Am I Here?

AnaK118 — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 21:57:15 GMT

To be honest, I don’t know why I’m here or if I stand a chance at making the first week of this challenge, but I feel like I need to do this.

I struggle with the purpose of my marriage daily. On one hand we seem like a good “team” with things we have in common, but on the other hand I feel unwanted. He married me after getting me pregnant and being pressured by the church. I always said I’d never get married just because of a baby, but things seemed like they were fitting together. I was never a person that wanted to be married or have kids or live what “most women want.” My hubby came from a family of four and his mom stayed home full time with them. I thought he understood where I was coming from but as time goes on it seems he thought marrying me would suddenly make me change into his mother. He always brings up having more kids even though he knows I’m not interested. He gets mad when I don’t keep the house clean. He makes rude remarks to me about it repeatedly.

Financially, I’m at a place where I can support my daughter and myself…even though she told me the other day if daddy and I “broke up” she’d want to live with him because he is stronger. Kind of a slap in the face since I’m the one who does 95% of everything for her. Oh well…she’s a kid.

I know the right thing to do is talk to him – but he isn’t exactly a listener. He has never hit me, but he yells and screams until he is literally spitting. At times he’ll be so angry he will punch things. The last time it got that bad the cops ended up at our house and I told him it would NEVER happen again – or he would no longer have a wife. We went to counseling and it was … eehhh. He still has days where I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. I don’t like confrontation and he doesn’t do well with criticism. I’m tired of stroking his ego as my only way of communicating what I need in our relationship.

I feel like 80% of what he says is insulting those around him and another 10% is him explaining why he is so awesome. I have to plan and wait for the right moment to talk to him about anything that needs his attention. Most of the time he is so wrapped up in his own life that whatever I say goes in one ear and out the other. He thinks his priorities are straight – and in an emergency, I’m sure they are. But day to day living, Facebook on his phone is more important to him than what me or our child might be saying to him.

I have not cheated on my husband, nor do I have plans to. I am thankful I have not been tempted because my heart is in so many shattered pieces and I am so scared right now. If the wrong temptation showed up – I cannot say with 100% certainty I could fight it. Part of me wants to pack my bags and let him come home to a house as empty has my heart has felt these last few years. The other part of me believes there is hope.

I guess that is what I’m doing here. I’m clinging to the hope that somehow there is a miracle answer that can come to me in 40 days. Or maybe it’s the justification that after 40 days I can say I tried and I have the right to move on. All I know is that I want to do my best and pray for God’s hand to do His will.

Scared, alone & confused,

AnaK

Day 1

sammy.bolin — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 23:19:15 GMT

I've realized my sin of not submitting to my husband. To be honest, I didn't think he deserved it. I still don't. But I'm praying for God to change my heart, and beginning this dare to become a more Godly, submissive and bearable wife. Anyone who reads this, please pray for me!

How to start. Please help!!

heatherjeremy13 — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 18:42:08 GMT

My husband, of 6 years, currently works out of town Mon-Friday, and usually up to 2 to 3 weeks at a time. He currently told me that he wanted to separate because we were not good for get other and all we do is fight. He left today for another week are two. How do I start the 40 day journey if my husband said he needed space/time to think. Should I call him anyways?

Day 27 and before...my story.

hopefullforever — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 17:23:07 GMT

This journey has been good for me. About 7 months ago, I found out I was pregnant with our 4th child. My husband was not happy. During my pregnancy, he said he blamed me since I was on the pill. He even initially asked if I was willing to abort, I of course objected. Unfortunately at six months pregnant, we lost our only daughter. He seemed very remorseful initially. About three days after the loss, he claimed he had fallen almost completely out of love with me. He had resentment that he could not get over. He said he is not sure if he wants to get the romantic feelings back for me. He has pretty much said that he has checked out, and even has used the words "I want out so bad". I started the Love Dare 27 days ago. We are still living together, and at times even act like we are fine. We still sleep in the same bed, are intimate at times, and he is still wearing his ring. I am trying to figure this all out. I understand that God will break you in order to bring you closer to him. That is exactly what's happening here. I was able to convince my husband to watch Fireproof about a week and half ago. He said nothing I do or say changes his heart....but he is still here. I have faith that it must be Gods will for our marriage to work since he has given me the strength to continue trying, and my husband for some reason, still hasn't left. I am having a hard time at times, remembering that this is my journey with Christ, not with trying to fix my marriage. I would love some guidance throughout from others and especially Sean. I plan to post daily for the rest of my journey.

He already moved out when i was not there

wen024 — Fri, 22 Mar 2013 17:30:15 GMT

I had no idea he was thinking about leaving. He has been depressed and stressed with work (he is self employed) and I knew he was in panic mode but had no idea he was thinking about leaving me. I've always just tried to be supportive even though I felt very lonely. His work has always been his mistress. He worked from home but I never was able to spend time with him.

Two days ago I can home from work and he was there waiting for me. He had already moved out everything of his, said that he is not happy and he is going yo divorce me. The reason he gave is because our personalities don't mix and we always butt heads and I combat and fight him on everything. ???? I had no idea where he got this!!!! We have had some disagreements that I tried to sit him down and lovingly work through but we never fight. And we haven't had that many disagreements. When work is not weighing on his mind, we've always had a great time together!

He said he felt this way on and off for a long time. But these feelings tend to happen when his business and financial situation is bleak. I have asked him many times if everything is OK and if there is anything he needs from me and he always says the same thing. Everything is fine. Now I'm being told that it's not fine for the first time and he's already gone.

I told him he's not getting a divorce out of me until he agrees on Christian counseling. He reluctantly agreed and is trying to push it along to get it over with.

My question is this. Can this method work for me when he's already gone?

Love Dare: Day 1

aSongBird2179 — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 12:43:42 GMT

Well this is the start of my love dare. I have attempted this so many times before and not been successful. I am hoping, through the help of this website, I will be more dedicated. My husband and I have been married for 13 years. We went through some funk our first few years then we got to a very blissful area. In the last year, we have got to where we don't agree. Now we are at t a point where we argue over everything. We are both defensive when we talk to each other. We both talked about it last night and realized that we are selfish. I have needs that I want met and He is the same. But because we don't meet each other's needs..... then we just hold out. Emotionally, Mentally, Sexually.

My husband left and says he no longer loves me

Hoffal01 — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 03:21:47 GMT

My husband within the last few days has left me an says he has fallen out of love with me and I deserve better. We have a daughter together and are young. We have faces many challenges over the years but this has been the hardest for me to grasp. I love him unconditionally and he says he doesn't feel the same. I'm lost and want to fix this and don't know if I can. Please help am I the only one who is going through this has anyone's marriage ever been here?

Day 1

LindsS — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 18:23:19 GMT

This is the first day of my 40 days. I don't know exactly what is happening in my marriage. All I know for sure is that he says he's tired and done. I told him to give me 40 days, and he agreed. I didn't tell him that I watched Fireproof on Saturday or that I was going to do the Love Dare. (SOOO THANKFUL that I saw that movie!) From here on, I know I have work to do and am committed to doing it. My hope is that he sees the changes and decides to make some of his own.

I haven't seen him today...he left before I was up, changed all our banking passwords, defriended and blocked me from FB. We've been communicating by text. Our son has baseball tonight, so I'm going to leave husband a note letting him know dinner is in the fridge and that I hope he had a good day at work. When I see him tonight, I plan on being pleasant and giving him some space. Am I on the right track with these ideas?

Should I tell my spouse and we do the love dare together?

raphael3 — Sat, 16 Mar 2013 00:06:14 GMT

Should I tell my spouse and we do the love dare together? Or should I do it on my own? My spouse does not trust me because of infidelity and lying in the past. I have been involved in cheating and porn and she feels like I'm not responsible, pervert, and not capable of being honest. Should I do it on my own or together with her?

Divorce...... Fifteen years later.

RayRay74 — Thu, 07 Mar 2013 05:15:27 GMT

I have a unique situation that I would like to share. 17 years ago I wedded a beautiful young women that I wholeheartedly loved and she loved me.... But we were young. She was age 20 and I 23. We argued constantly and both of us hurt each other dearly. She was unfaithful and after two short painful years we split up. Since then I heard from her occasionally maybe every four or five years or so. Nothing substantial would come of these reconnections other than the obligatory how have you been? Or what's new in your life? Now, 15 years after our divorce she contacted me via Facebook and gave me her phone number. We have chatted quite a bit since and neither of us have ever remarried. We discussed what went wrong and how we both handled our marriage so poorly those many years ago. Neither of us have lived a life pleasing to The Lord. We both are single parents of wonderful children that have no knowledge of the previous spouse. As we conversed about our past and our lives since I became so utterly convicted and I realized that I could have saved us both much pain and heartache if I had been the man that both she and God wanted me to be. Suddenly, I have come to the realization that she is the woman that God had always intended for me..... Yet we live with our children on opposite ends of the continent. Three hour time zone differences. I watched Fireproof a few years ago and recently I have watched it again and again. I have ordered the love dare book and am eager to begin this journey because I have never truly known how to show love. I am a selfish person and have always been so. I need a change of heart. I need to learn how to more closely mirror the heart of God. I have no idea how she feels about a future with me although she has been very receptive to having daily casual conversations with me. I am intimidated by all of the obstacles before me such as the distance, the children's other parents and the inability for either of to relocate due to the other parental needs. I truly am in a hopeless situation. But with our God all things are possible. I have decided to put my faith wholly in Him and if He is leading me to pursue her then pursue I will. I will leave all of the obstacles and fears up to Him. If He can reunite us after all these years with all of this baggage across an entire continent then He truly is an all-powerful God and immensely worthy of all praise.

I will continue to post updates to give hope to others in a situation such as mine because I am expecting nothing less than a miracle and when that miracle occurs I wish the hopeless and heart broken to see God's amazing power.

I need help

David100 — Mon, 04 Mar 2013 02:24:24 GMT

What if?

SweetCheeks2013 — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 14:02:22 GMT

My name is Jessica and my husband's name is Mark. We have been married for 3 years and together for 5. I started The Love Dare today because my husband has been asking for a divorce for the past 2 months. He doesn't really give a reason why. He just says that we fight all the time and he doesn't want to "deal with it anymore." He has been very angry for several months now and doesn't have an explanation as to why.

My question is this....what if I do The Love Dare and at the end of 40 days he still wants a divorce? What do I do then?

day 1 = terrified

KendraB — Tue, 19 Feb 2013 21:51:31 GMT

Hello,

My husband and I have been married for a year and a half but have been together for over 7 years. We have a 6 year old daughter and 5 week old twins. 3 weeks ago I discovered my husband has been having an affair. He said he loved me but wasn’t sure if he's in love with me anymore, that he thought it would be best if we divorced and he's been gone ever since.

I was raised in the church and even though I strayed a few times I've always been led back to my roots by the Holy Spirit. My husband is sort of the opposite. When we finally got serious about our relationship some 4 years ago I told him that if we were going to be married he had to get serious about his relationship with the Lord and I would wait while he did that and I did. Everything was fine until I got pregnant with the twins. We had struggled with infertility and the whole time we stood firm on the promise that God would give us the child we longed for. And when that promise was finally realized we were overjoyed but being pregnant with twins was a big strain on my body, mind and our relationship and 4 months in he just became very distant and cold and I still don’t know why exactly. But I was pretty oblivious to it until around new years when he would hardly even speak to me no matter what I did.

At this point he will hardly speak to me which frustrates me to no end. Having just had twins my emotions are completely out of wack and I’m having a really hard time dealing with all of this PLUS 2 babies all on my own. I’ve just been crying out to God praying I get through this. I don’t want a divorce. I love my husband and cherish my marriage. We both have our shortcomings but I never ever thought it would come to this. I have so many questions and no answers at all. I’m heartbroken. When I read day 1 I knew it was going to be a challenge because patience is something I’ve always struggled with but I’m trying. So, so hard.

I could really use some words of encouragement because I just know this is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done but it’s worth it.

Kendra

Held my tounge

sarahrip — Mon, 18 Feb 2013 02:01:20 GMT

My DH (dear hubby) and I started the love dare yesterday and boy was it a tough day... DH blew up at my son for using my ipad that I gave him permission to use and DS talked back, so I held my tonge and desided to let go and let God take care of it. later that night DH and I agreed to disagree on it and the next morning God took care of it and both DH and DS made up and forgave each other.

day 1, i messed up

timpinney — Sat, 02 Feb 2013 19:03:33 GMT

So I need advice,I've been with this woman for almost 3 years now, we've got a daughter together, we're not married, but I want to marry her with everything I am, I love her more then anything, a year and a half back I cheated on her with my ex, while she was pregnant, yet after a while she took me back, but when she talks about it, I get mad. This first dare is super hard for me cause I really don't like talking about it cause I know how much I hurt her, mentally and physically, because when we would fight about it, it would get physical, I've never hit her, but I've grabbed her wrists threatening to break them, I say this so no one is to think im a victim. Its really hard for me to admit this. Im the guy who would beat other guys up for doing what I've done. I've calmed down alot and im finding my way back to God. Im changing more everyday. But now im unemployed and we're fighting about the past again and im afraid of what will happen if it gets worse. She keeps bringing it up and it feels like that's all she wants to talk about, I've also found that my ex, who I cheated on her with is claiming her kid is mine now, and is trying to get me for child support, the child wasn't born while me and my girlfriend were together, but it's the reason I started talking to my ex in the first place. But my girlfriend has made it clear that if the little girl is mine, she'll end up leaving me. So I've started the love dare secretly, I want to show her that im leagues different then I was, im a better man and father, but I still have more work to do, but I don't want her to leave me. I love her. Im doing this for this dream of a family with her. Including if it comes down to this other little girl is mine. I need advice on how to see if she would do this dare too on her own, without it causing a fight.

Quit

musedu — Sat, 02 Feb 2013 05:48:45 GMT

Hello my husband and I have been separated for a little over a year. Due to circumstances we live and the same house but in separate rooms we do not kiss, touch, hug we act just like roommates not husband and wife. I started this dare because I truly believed that God would restore my marriage and bring us back to a good place because God designed marriage. I have not seen a single person since we have been separated he has seen several people and very vocal about this marriage being over and I am moving out in May. This book was my last resort because I really wanted to save my marriage. I am on day 18 and was told no to dinner. I am officially giving up and quitting this Dare. I had/have a close relationship with God before this book and will continue I will just never again pray that he restores my marriage and I will never believe anyone again that says this worked for them and this turned this marriage around. I do believe that those people who do not have a relationship with God that this may bring them closer to God. I am throwing away the book and will never look at it again! This has been a total fail and brought me high hopes.

Is the Love Dare for me?

maddyinchrist — Wed, 30 Jan 2013 18:55:14 GMT

I haven't been married. God brought a wonderful man into my life, and we both knew shortly after we met that God wants us to get married. Everything was beyond amazing and definitely God. The relationship was a beautiful blessing.... but then we started to let other things become our main focus instead of God, which I believe opened the door up for satan. From that point, our relationship had the average fights here and there. We still loved each other through the fights, even if it was difficult. Then one day, almost out of the blue, he broke up with me. Why? I can't really tell you. It's only been a week that we've been apart, but God has been teaching me so much already. I felt like God lead me to buy this book, although I'm not sure if I should even do it because I wasn't married to this man, and we aren't to the point where we can talk with each other. I know I could do this book without him and just pray for him, but I also don't want to go through the book if I'm supposed to be leaving him alone.

Any advice? Has anyone been in this situation before with this book?

Day 1

corkyacu — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 19:58:21 GMT

I started the dare today even though my husband is unwilling to try anything to help our marriage. He is set in my being a better person and someone he wants to be around. He believes he is perfect and that he has no problems what so ever. I am the reason our marriage is failing. I don't know if doing this alone will make much if a difference. It's either this or I walk away. We have three kids and they need us together. How do I do the when he is so unwilling to see he is the problem too? We didn't get here alone. We got here together.

Husband is about to go to Afghanistan

jennifermy35 — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 17:59:59 GMT

My husband has just under 40 days here in the states before we say goodbye for our 4th deployment together. We have been married for 3 years and yesterday, my husband announced that he has no more hope or faith in our marriage. After reading a bit into the love dare- I realize that I can no longer wait for my husband to change his ways- I have to be that change. It is both of us and since I am the one with faith in us, I will find a way to restore it in him. I know that his is between Christ and I. I am not a very religous person. I did not grow up with Christ in my home, and I struggle with my faith in Christ. Maybe I can find my faith through this? All I know is that I am willing to do what ever it takes to learn how to love my husband again.